Grumbling at the DMV

Everyone hates to go to the DMV. You just know that you have to show up at a certain time, to just grab a number to hopefully find a seat within the waiting area. Then there is the fear that you forgot something important at home that they are going to say you have to have, to be able to sign a certain paper in order to transfer a title to your cousins’ best friend. We have to go through all the steps and sign in just the right spots or we are sent away to try again. What makes it worse, is the DMV does not need us. We need them if we want a license, to be able to legally drive a car and so on. We don’t like the DMV because no matter how much we hate it, our lives can be alter by this state department. We don’t have control.

There are people out there in the world that actually like being told what to do. That is where they feel comfortable and that is ok for them. For the rest of us we really can’t stand when we are told “no” or “wait”. We don’t like to be scolded, we don’t like to be corrected whether over something big or small. It takes a “big person” to be mature enough to accept when these things happen without getting upset. Control is lost when someone points out something they feel as not correct in someone else’s life. Most often the first response is to get defensive or to redirect the correction to something else, instead of taking responsibility for what is being said and looking into it further. It could be that you were right all along, and could teach the other person instead.

My boss recently came up with a plan to encourage team members to remember to put credits on certain client’s accounts. She was going to give away a prize after a predetermined time frame to the person that remembered to give the credits the most. It was a great idea and gave team members a chance to compete and our clients won in the end too. One day my boss was talking to me, telling me that I couldn’t be a part of the competition because I was a “leader” and so it wouldn’t be fair, but she then preceded to tell me it was probably better anyways because out of everyone on the team I was the worst at forgetting these credits. My first response of course was an excuse, but then I conceded that she was probably right. Granted in this situation it really didn’t bother me too much that I was the worst, but what if she had told me that I wasn’t doing as good of a job as I should be based on my experience in answering the phones or some other task? I guarantee I would have be a lot more defensive, and had more excuses to give.

We have it in our minds the level in which we do certain jobs or tasks. We may think we are doing pretty good but then someone comes along and tells us differently. It hurts our feelings, it makes us mad and gets us frustrated. Kind of like going to the DMV, you get to the counter and “did you bring your birth certificate?” or “it looks like you didn’t pass your driving test”, or even better “did you bring the form that let’s us know you are who you say you are?” is asked or stated. Man is that frustrating, maddening and hurtful. Do the good people at the DMV strive to do these things? No, but then do we as patrons strive to make mistakes? Here’s what I am getting at: there is not a single person in this beautiful world that is perfect. Should we strive to be the best we can be? Of course, but when it comes to what we do in this space we occupy, grace should be handed out in barrels. We could be like the DMV and say we don’t need people, people need us, but that would be the wrong attitude to have. Grace allows us to learn and grow, make mistakes and strive to do better. It allows others those same freedoms. Until next time:

A mistake that makes you humble, is better than an achievement that makes you arrogant

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