It’s the Little Things

I finally had a chance to slow down enough to go out with a girlfriend recently. It was what my heart needed not only because she is an amazing person, but because in visiting with her she humbled me without even knowing it. We had both gotten off of work and met at a restaurant that is an original in our town and has pretty decent food but ultimately has a waitress that we love to have as “ours”. As my friend and I were visiting she saw someone else she knew at the restaurant. To see her face light up when she caught their attention was awesome. She truly cared and was interested in how they were doing including saying something about their adorable grandchildren. This is not a new thing with her, she is so very caring and speaks her mind, which brings up the part in which she humbled me.

As we were visiting I was telling her of some difficult situations I was dealing with and some of the people that were involved. She listened, and she let me vent, but what I noticed afterwards (only because it takes me a little while to process) is that she never once spoke ill or bad about anyone that she and I talked about. That is conviction without saying a word, and very humbling since I am nowhere near perfect, nor is she, but she helped in making me see that grumbling is not the answer, and trying to be more gracious is what I should be trying to do. Now if she reads this she may be thinking “I did that?!?” Yes, my friend you did without even knowing it.

I am obviously a hard headed person because I had to re-learn that same lesson the next day when while I was at work. I had to take care of a situation but I didn’t do it in the most gracious manner and there were people in the room that had listening ears. It’s so hard to say I will never have that attitude again or I won’t ever think of that person like that again, because saying never ultimately sets you up for failure. We are all sinful creatures and mess up a lot. What I tend to do is put myself above others (most of the time not seeing I am doing it until afterwards) by saying things like “oh, I wouldn’t do it that way” or ” what was that person thinking?” or even ” why wouldn’t they do it this way?” Ding, ding, ding somewhere along the way I did something differently than someone else and they said these things about me. Once again after processing what I did and said I had to allow humbleness to pour over me and I had to admit I am far from perfect.

So why is it that we want to make ourselves seem better than someone else? We bring up the negative way before we bring up the positive. A major part is because our brains are wired that way, we have to see what is out there that can harm us so we survive better. The downside is that while we are doing this we are missing out on the positive that is all around us. I love being around people that find joy in their surroundings. People that can give hugs while also letting you know you need to “temper down” are lifesavers. People who humble you and convict you without even realizing it are like diamonds that sparkle in the light. I would love to say that I won’t need to be knocked in the head again because of something I said or did, but I do hope that I have more “little things” that I do to help people than I have reasons to be convicted. While I was at work I walked passed a saying that had been framed. I never really paid attention to it until today but I will use it to end my post. Until next time:

There comes a time in all our lives when nothing seems to blend. When all the world is frowning, that’s when we need a friend.

Someone who’ll sit and listen, and perhaps add a word or two. Who with kindness hears your troubles, who we know have troubles too.

So we then owe that someone a few precious moments when we listen to their troubles, that’s the measure of a real friend.

Now the scales are balanced, and when all is said and done, our troubles seem so very small that means we both have won.

Clayton Hobart Fox