What Is Your Why?

Find your why

All too often people will want to do something because they think that is what they really want to do. What happens is they start to do this said thing and realize that it really wasn’t what they wanted. Some are lucky enough to figure this out before they make a big change in their lives but sometimes others aren’t so lucky and have to deal with the consequences of their decision. So what influences people? From what I have learned over the years social media is huge, family, friends, snap decisions based on a conversation. We are a society that seems to get bored quickly so we jump to the next great thing until that doesn’t satisfy us. Instant gratification simple as that. Most of the time we get trapped in his mindset because we don’t know our why. Why do we want to do the next best thing? Why do we want this change? Why is this one thing important to us?

My youngest child has the hardest time saving money. He gets his allowance and within a day it is spent. Now I will give you, he is eight and we are working to help him get better at saving for the things he really wants. The thing is, he changes his mind so often on what he wants I don’t think he knows anymore. So after he went to a friend’s birthday party he decided he wanted a hoover board like hers. He looked it up online and found out the price and even went as far to determine how long it would take him to save up the money based on what he got for his allowance. He did a great job in his research and even asked if he could do extra chores to earn more money. My husband and I were willing to help him too. He had his goal, he had his plan and he was excited to start….until he went and played Fortnite one night and found out there was a new skin he could buy for his character. His money was spend faster than I could has supercalifragalistic expialedosious. His why wasn’t strong enough to keep him from spending his money. He really wanted that hoover board, but that would take some time to get, so when the opportunity to buy something from his game came up and he knew he had the money for that, the game because more important and he got his instant gratification. Now my son is eight and this comes with the territory and I know he’ll learn that saving up for something is far better than that quick buy that you quickly forget about.

A few nights ago I had just gotten off of work and was a bit tired. My husband had been home with the kids and had been working on different jobs around the house as well as shopping and getting dinner done. I absolutely love that he is my best friend and we parent together. After dinner was done though I was ready to turn off my brain (somewhat) and get into a book I had been reading. My husband had other thoughts in mind and decided to take the dog on an evening walk. I had just sat down as he was heading out, I know my “why” for what I was doing was that I needed some down time. The next morning when I was on my own walk with our dog, I started thinking about the night before and why it was I didn’t t go on the walk with my husband. It would have been a great time for us to be alone, as well as be able to talk without interruption from the kids. One of my favorite things to do is go on walks and a walk with the hubby is even better. I started to feel a little guilty and even sad that I missed an opportunity to be with my man, but then it hit me. At that moment the night before, I was listening to my body, I was tired, I was ‘brain tired” and I needed to just take a break and not move for a while. My “why” at that moment was rest.

When it comes to finding your why, it takes stepping back and listening to yourself, praying and going to someone you trust when there is a big decision to make. Social media has taught us that instant gratification can happen. We get the “news” as it is happening. We get shown wonderful places to visit and fun things to make or try. We are influenced by those around us to change, to try something new. We look at our lives in the present and think “I need more, I need more stuff to be happy, I need more friends because the silence is too much, I need more adventures because my life is slowing down”. The list can go on and on. Our “why”has to come from inside. It has to be prayed about and thought out. When we don’t have our “why“ firmly in place we are just kites getting blown in the wind. Find the time to slow down and just be, and while you are there think about the things and people that are important to you and then from there you will start to build what your “why”is all about. Until next time:

Find out who you are and be that person. That’s what your soul was put on this earth to be. Find that truth, live that truth, and everything else will come.

Ellen Degeneres