The best answer was “I’ll have to think about it”
Have you ever noticed that stress levels go up when trying to make a decision? The decision could be about whether to have ice cream after dinner or if you want to take a trip for the weekend. I know when I am in the decision making process a conversation could go like this:
Q: Do you want to ride your motorcycle into work today?
Questions I ask to make a decision: Well is it going to rain today? Is there construction on the road I will be traveling? What do I have to bring into work and do I have enough room in the saddlebags for it? Did I wake up early enough to get my stuff ready in time to leave a bit early so that I can ride my bike? How cold is it? How tired am I? I wonder if I will have to stay late tonight? Do I need gas? Is there anywhere I need to go after work?
A: Nope gonna take the care today
I think even when I am deciding if I want cheesecake or not I still have these types of thoughts go through my head when the only answer that should be said is “YES!” . I am one that likes to weigh all my options, most of the times. I am a fickle fellow in the sense that there are some decisions I make that I look back on and think “man how did I not get hurt by that decision? I got lucky I guess” and other times I take so much time deciding, that I miss out on the opportunity.
So why does this happen? When people make a choice they have to choose something over another. If they chose wrong there is disappointment and having to live with that choice. The hidden factor is fear. Fear of being left out, the fear of making the wrong choice, the fear of not being good enough, the fear of having to explain yourself….the list goes on and on.
By stepping back, getting out of the situation and yes even “sleeping on it” you can go into any situation with a clear head. About 15 years ago my husband I went out to look for a new car. It would be the first new car we both had so we were pretty excited. Where we live is Subaru country and we had heard that they were great cars overall, so off we went to our local Subaru dealership. We walked the lot, looked at the different models and promptly got spotted by the super friendly salesperson. He talked to us about the different models and the benefits of each car. We knew we would need a little bit bigger of a car since we wanted to start a family soon and we had two big dogs. We did do some research before we went to the dealership so that we would know our range of price. So when it was time to sit and talk numbers the super friendly salesperson told us our price, told us the promotions and let us think about it. When he came back into his office to “seal the deal” we told him “thank you we need to think about it” We then informed him we found the same car online for thousands less than he had offered us, and that we needed to see if we could explore that option as well. When he saw we were willing to walk out of his office without buying anything, he lowered the price to close to the price we had found and waited for our response. We said thank you, repeated that we needed to think about it and got up to leave, but we did say we will be back. He then made the comment that most people who leave without buying usually don’t come back to actually buy but that he hopes we will. Later that day, we came back and bought our very first new car for the price we agreed on. My husband and I were willing to step back, and evaluate the option we had when it came to the decision we had before us. Had we not, we would have paid thousands more than what we wanted to for the car.
Sometimes it is not as cut and dry. The decision to leave a stressful situation has more grey areas than black and white. Talking to someone about a raise or proposing to your gal, though exciting can be nerve racking at best. Choosing what is best for you and your time is what the outcomes must be. Nobody wants to live with regret. Living with the Best Yes for your life means that with anything you chose to do you chose based on what was the best for your life at the moment and beneficial for your future. Ok now before anyone reminds me that cheesecake is not that great for me in my future, I would agree within you (probably with a grudge though) but normally I eat my cheesecake with friends and because I chose to do that the cheesecake may not be that great for me, but the friendships definitely are.
The outcome of a lifetime of making good and bad choices is a life that is lived. Having the courage to step out and try something new, having the courage to say “No” when it is needed, loving when it’s hard, and saying goodbye. Making decisions can be stressful but when time is taken to step back, breathe, evaluate if it’s good for you physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually they can be made with a confidence that you took the time to care for yourself first so that others could be cared for later. Think on that, and I would love to hear your comments. Until next time:
Don’t entrust your future on others’ hands. Rather make decisions by yourself with the help of God’s guidance. Hold your beliefs so tight and never let go of them!”
― Hark Herald Sarmiento