Did I give you permission to be rude?

Imagine what it would be like if someone came into your work, or your place of business with a scowl on their face, a negative “energy” that just bounced off the walls and literally had a look that pierced you with daggers. I am sure each and everyone one of us has met this type of person. I would really hope that not one of us is not that type of person, because that is just a sad way to live a life in my opinion. Sadly today I had the “pleasure” of coming in contact with this type of person. I was just going out to get this individual’s dog for a nail trim and had mentioned that the dog was due for some vaccines. This did not make this person very happy because it would mean more money out of her pocket. This person decided she would wait to get the vaccines, so all I had to do was take her dog, but I couldn’t because I had to get out of the area she was in before I broke down. I went to the treatment room in the back and I started to cry. Why? Not because I couldn’t handle the rudeness of this particular person, or the way she felt she could talk to me, it was that I had reached my breaking point for the week. I could have been rude right back to her, I could have treated and talked to her like she had to me, but instead I was pleasant to her, I talked nicely to her and I loved on her dog. I am not saying this makes me a better person because I am not. At that moment it just meant I could put on a professional front even as I walked away wiping my tears.

This experience got me thinking about what it is we do as a society to explain away the actions of these types of people. We say things like “oh, he’s always been this way” or “well she has had a tough few years” or even “hey don’t let it get to you, she is like this with everyone” We try to explain away the hurtful words and actions and basically say ” just deal with it, this is just who they are”. At what point does someone say enough is enough? We have heard this over and over again, people have baggage. Sometimes a person’s baggage is heavier to carry around than someone elses and the strain of it cause them to have more bad days than good. So does that mean that those of us whose lives are going ok should just grin and bear it when rudeness is thrown at us? No, but adding fuel to the negative fire will serve no purpose.

I admit, my first instinct today was to vomit some nastiness back in this lady’s face. She had no right to be rude to me, even if she was having a particular bad day, I could have been having one too. Instead I walked away, giving the excuse I needed to get a leash, and I did the only thing my body allowed me to do, I cried. I didn’t know I needed that cry until it happened, and what came next was amazing. The women I work with came and encouraged me, they had my back. The doctor went up and got the dog, the receptionist charged the lady out and I was able to get the nail trim done. I had support, which got me thinking did this particular lady have this kind of support in her life? I would hope so but my guess is probably not, and that in itself is sad.

The act of being kind is not easy but is one that should be practiced and used whenever possible. To be kind means at times you must turn the other cheek, and realize that even one small act of kindness can change a person’s life. There is this leader, teacher really, who exudes love and kindness to the point that his life was cost because of it. This teacher would use real life experiences to teach his students kindness, love, hope, peace, humility, self control and so many other qualities. He didn’t stick to how the world thought he should teach and this is where he got himself into hot water. His students took what they were taught and started teaching others to the point that governments were starting to notice and didn’t like that this one person was able to change the mindsets and hearts of so many. One person living and teaching what was in his heart changed so many lives ( I hope that you were able to figure out the teacher was Jesus), and because of what he taught He was killed but we were saved because of Him. That is the type of person I want affecting my life.

Most often we don’t need to make excuses for people who treat us kindly, or with love. There is no need to explain this type of behavior away. I think we need to be strong for each other. We need to support each other especially because we don’t know what the other person is going through. I think both men and women need this but women more so since we tend to wear our hearts on our sleeves. I think that being strong means that a good cry has to happen. It is cleansing, it relieves so much built up pressure, it makes us realize we are human. Being strong means knowing when enough is enough and taking some down time. Recently I came upon this company that encourages being strong to the point that all their products have this logo “Just Strong”. I love the sentiment behind this, don’t forget your past, but it’s in the past learn from it and move on. Encourage and support each other, celebrate with each other, lift each other up, challenge each other, and most importantly remember to do all these things to the person in the mirror. If you want to check out this company click here and use this coupon code HEABAR10 at checkout. Until next time:

The effects of kindness are not often seen immediately. Sometimes it will take years for your kindness to pay off, and is returned to you. And sometimes you never see the fruits of your labors, but they are there, deep inside of the soul of the one you touched.

Dan Kelly