It is that time of year. The time in which parents of pre-teens dread the news and parents of teens come to appreciate the hard work. If you have ever had a child learn to play an instrument you understand what I mean. I absolutely love that the public school system has kept band as an elective, and I appreciate that kids have to start somewhere when learning to play. It’s when the band concerts are scheduled that the weariful pride comes out.
Last night we went to my youngest child’s band concert. The band instructor had it at the local high school gym so that there would be room for all of the beginning, middle and advance bands to be. I get the logic behind this since most high school gyms have room for large crowds but that also means that bleachers are what you get to sit on for an hour plus. I have muscles I didn’t know I had hurting today because of all the weird positions I had to sit in just to get comfortable, but I digress.
The way this concert is ran is they have the beginning band start so that we can see where the kids start and so we can hear how all their practicing (or lack there of) has paid off. I will say I was impressed. When my son first picked up the trumpet a few months ago he had a hard time getting a squeak out of it. Now he and his fellow classmates were able to play four songs through without so much as a squeak. What’s awesome about it, is they are excited and they are proud of how far they have come, and they should be. Playing an instrument is hard and it takes practice to get better at it. So when the middle school band was announced next to play we all anticipated that they would sound better than the beginners.
It’s amazing what dedication and practicing can do! When it comes to pre-teens and teens it can be hard to get them to stick to anything besides rolling their eyes at their parents and sleeping, but these kids sounded good. As I started to “relax” in my 5th semi-comfortable position of the night I really felt that I could follow where the music wanted to take me. It’s almost the same as when you read a book, if you allow the music to take you to faraway places it will. It was at this point that I started to think back to when I was in band. I loved that time in my life. We had an amazing teacher who taught us the importance of just listening to the music and letting it flow through us.
By the time the high school band was warming up to play I was ready. My eldest daughter was sitting with me and we had just discussed how she regrets leaving the band when she did. She had a lot of friends in the band but it wasn’t just that, there is a sense of pride when it comes to taking a difficult piece and making it come alive. The high school band has been working on a few pieces to head to competition with and they had chosen two of them to share with us. The first one had my eyes watering and my heart soaring. I looked over at my daughter as she was wiping tears away. By the time the second piece was done I felt alive. Music has a way of doing that to you. I can’t tell you the name of the pieces but I can say those high school kids worked hard to be good at what they do. They had to start somewhere and for most of them it was the elementary band in which my son played in.
Like those teens when we do something for the first time we can’t expect to be good at it. We have to start somewhere and we will make mistakes. Like those teens though persistence is everything. They chose to make band important. They practiced, they showed up, they took pride in what they did. Music was the outcome this time. I used to hate having to perform in the band concerts when I was a kid/teen, and as an adult I can’t say I am excited to go hear a squeaky version of “Twinkle, twinkle little star”, but I also know that a squeaky version of a piece of music can turn into a masterpiece with patience and hard work. Music is healing and powerful. Music can make you come alive. Music can cause your imagination to go into overdrive and it is wonderful. Try it out, go to a band concert, cheer on those kids because they are working on something great. Until next time:
Be soft. Do not let the world make you hard. Do not let pain make you hate. Do not let bitterness steal your sweetness. Take pride that even though the rest of the world may disagree, you still believe it to be a beautiful place.
Kurt Vonnegut
Rae’s New Shine Children’s Book
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
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Visit JoyfullyLivingGoods@etsy.com for some fun merchandise, including stickers, clothing, phone cases and more. All geared towards living Joyfully. Come check it out!
You have two days and one night to do what you want for yourself. How would you spend your time? Would you have someone with you? Would you take a pet? Would you go somewhere? Would you stay inside or go outside?
When I was younger all I wanted to do was be busy. I wanted to do things with friends, be invited to events, and just do anything other than be at home doing nothing. When I lived at home this was easy because I had a great youth group, and I had friends who always seemed to want to go to the beach or somewhere close by. Living in the LA area made it easy as well to find something to do. Once I moved to college though things changed. It was in a smaller town and I had to be outgoing. Not my thing.
Now as a more “mature and older” adult my busy looks different. It is more about the job and the family than it is about doing activities with friends or going to events. Now if something comes up that I would like to go to I am all for it until the day the event happens, then I find myself hoping something will come up that makes it so I don’t have to go. Don’t get me wrong, I usually still go to whatever it is and I usually have so much fun, but the build up to it is tiring.
So what would I do if I were given this assignment? Well I know my Bible and some books would come with me. I would not be able to stay at home because I would let my mind wander to all the things that need to get done. I would plan for time outside, maybe in a kayak with my hubby right along side me. I know for my me time, something new would have to be tried. Maybe a new food or a new hike something like that. The one thing I can say for certain is I don’t want to make any decisions and only having fun and time for reading are allowed.
Mostly it would be a time for getting grounded, getting back to the person I am vs. the person I need to be in my real life. The real world will always draw you into what you need to be, what you need to do, who you need to take care of. It’s my responsibility to make sure my world is care for too. We only do so much for others when our cup is running low, or for some: empty. We can be everything for everyone. Only one person can do that: Jesus.
So I ask again, what would you do if you were given this assignment? Until next time:
Be so fiercely you that you inspire others to be themselves, too.
Samira Vivette
Rae’s New Shine Children’s Book
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
$10.00
Visit JoyfullyLivingGoods@etsy.com for some fun merchandise, including stickers, clothing, phone cases and more. All geared towards living Joyfully. Come check it out!
I had three goals this weekend: get out and ride my motorcycle, get the back deck set up so when I want to relax it’s available, and the third one was to get my blog post written for the week. Three simple goals. Three simple goals that were intermixed with three kids, three animals, work, and a hubby that took a motorcycle road trip for three days. The impossible, possible task was to not go insane trying to get my three goals met.
My hubby left Friday morning which is really no big deal, the kids and I had to be at work and school. The dogs and the cat are used to being home alone so their day was filled with barking and passerby’s (obviously the dogs only) and sleeping with the occasional walk to the water/food bowels. In all honesty I think Charlie and Lily (the youngest and oldest in the furry bunch) just wait to see what kind of trouble Jorj the middle furry child can get himself into. The boy loves to get stuck in my daughters room when he goes searching for the cat food. The kids get home before me, which usually means they have hours to sit, watch their screens and eat food. Probably not all in that order, and there is often a nap that splits up their activities. I am in no way calling my kids lazy, just unmotivated to do anything other than what’s in front of them at the time being.
I say all this because I realized that I have three humans that rely on me to do certain things with them or for them. Most of the time it is a give and take. I love the relationships that I have with my kids and will drop what I am doing if they ask me to help or do something with them. What I have to account for is the time that I give away is then subtracted from the time I set aside for myself. So Friday night after working all day, I had dinner and then spent an hour plus mowing our lawn so that Saturday would have more free time. I then proceed to do other household chores until sleep overtook me. What I convinced myself was this: If I got these chores done tonight I would have more time tomorrow.
You know what happened of course. Saturday was filled in with more things to do with the family and more chores to do around the house. Granted the back deck got done so I now have place to relax (when I set aside time to relax), but because I did not put limits on what I was doing, Saturday flew by and by 9:45pm that night I was forcing my eldest daughter to stop talking to me so that I could go to bed. Once alone though I opened a book and read, finally some time to just be.
Now I know the saying: they are only young once, enjoy it while you can. I counter with this, if you are so crazy tired from “enjoying every moment” are you really actually enjoying them? I am the kind of person that needs down time, alone time, time to regroup and get my head back in the game. I have a busy job, I have a loud family, and I have people and animals that count on me to be put together. So Sunday came down to this: my daughter and I already had the obligation to teach Sunday School, so that was set in place. The rest of the day wasn’t. So I rode my motorcycle to church so that I could leave afterwards for a trip around town. So two goals were met. After doing a couple of minor things with my kids, my downtime started. I did nothing. I sat on the couch, I read, and I practically fell asleep sitting up. It was awesome, no one needed me to do anything for them.
I know I chose to be a momma, and I wouldn’t give it up for anything, just as I chose to be married, have a job, and try side jobs along the way. I also know it’s my choice to let the activities and jobs that are going to be there anyway overtake what it is I really need to do for my self care. This whole weekend was a cluster of choices that I made knowing full well that I was going to be putting myself on the backburner for a bit. I am grateful I did that in some aspects because it was time with my loved ones, but in other ways I wish I had given myself more time to just be.
The work/school week starts again tomorrow. My hubby is home, the kids are gearing up for school, the chore lists have been assigned and the dogs have gotten their zoomies out g and are gearing up for a week of snoozing. What did I gain from the weekend? A mowed lawn, a deck ready for relaxing, kids who felt acknowledged, memories made and a hubby who came back from a good trip. What I wish I had gotten more of what “me time” and so I will strive this week to get that for myself. It’s a constant flow of trying to balance life, but in the end the balance does seem to come. Until next time:
Life is about balance. You don’t always need to be getting stuff done. Sometimes it’s perfectly okay, and absolutely necessary, to shut down, kick back and do nothing.
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
Mother’s Day was yesterday and because of that I want to send a shout out to all the mothers that are in the trenches trying their very best. Now when I say mothers, I am also talking about the non-traditional ones too: the aunts, the grandmas, the step-moms, and foster mommas. We are a team all wanting the same outcome: kids that grow up to be happy, functional adults, but because we want this, we have to go through the battles of life with our kids.
When our kids were little it was all about having them eat their food, take naps and finding enriching activities for them to do. When I was working at the church we would have MOPs group that would meet on a regular basis and when they were not meeting they would schedule “play dates” for their kids. Social media shows mommas making sure their kids do chores with the family while also having fun. Little kids have the ability to show you a side of the world that is bright and wonderful and full of interesting things like….rocks, lol. Little kids have their own set of worries as well but they don’t seem as big as when they get older. They have an innocence about them, they trust their parents and their view on the world is really what is in front of them at the moment. This is why it is so fun to have them experience new things because their joy is exponentially more for their parents. When I look back on when my kids were little their view on life was so much easier.
When our kids grow a little older (which some days I wish I could have slowed down), the world gets into the picture. Social media plays a huge part in their lives. Not here to bash on social media since it has it’s place, but when it is too much of a part of our teens lives it can be detrimental. Teens and pre-teens are a league of their own. Mommas who are this stage are holding on for dear life to the safety harness the roller coaster offers. If you have ever been on a roller coaster you know the anticipation that comes when waiting in line. People all around you are talking about how fun it is, but there are certain parts that really made them nervous. They will tell you about the one section of the track where your seat feels like it falls out from under you and then the rides shoots you into a upside down loop. They tell you their favorites spots and the parts they hated. The thing is they, are willing to go on it the ride again. This is the life of a mom of teens/pre-teens. This is the only way I can think to describe it. A roller coaster. They are rides that are worth the wait, that seem terrifying and fun all in one and seem to always be done in seconds. Mommas who are still in line, or in the midst of the ride, or who have just stepped of the ride to just get back in line again: I salute you, and I am in line with you.
I have heard that teens/pre-teens do grow older. I know it’s true because somehow I did. I am not in that mom stage yet but I have heard, this is the stage in which your kids realize that mom (and dad) have some knowledge. That they can be fun. That when life gets tough, they are still there for you. When life is fun they are there for you too. When I called my momma yesterday to wish her a Happy Mother’s Day I had to leave a message. She called a couple of hours later wondering if any of her kids were going to call. We talked for a little bit, and it’s in those moments that I realize she is a champion, a survivor and most of all she did a great job as a mom. She is in the grandma stage of her life. She knows how it feels to be in the stages of life her kids are in right now. She made it! Because of her and her willingness to raise us with a faith in Christ, with a yearning to enjoy the world around us, and to take responsibility for our actions, she now has kids who are trying to raise their kids in the same way.
So I want to say thanks to mom, but also thanks to all the momma’s who are “waiting in line for the ride” and for those mommas who haven’t made it to the line yet. We are all out here trying our best with raising our kids. For all those out their who support and love on the mommas while they are in this time, they feel it and appreciate it, I know I do!! Until next time:
Be so fiercely you that you inspire others to be themselves too.
Samira Vivette
Rae’s New Shine Children’s Book
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
***THIS IS A POST I WROTE A COUPLE OF YEARS AGO AND I WANTED TO SHARE IT AGAIN WITH YOU NOW***
Quality over quantity
When you look in the dictionary the definition of friendship is this: It is a state of being friends: friendly relation, or attachment, to a person, or between persons; affection arising from mutual esteem and good will. This sounds so stagnant, unliving, flat. Who would want to have a friendship if it really was based on the definition? Luckily friendships are living and breathing, they have an ebb and flow. They are based on the stupid stuff you did last summer, the fun trip you took to the fair, the impromptu lunch date. Some friendships are there for a specific season and others are there for a lifetime. Friendships start to take on a living form like breathing in and out. To have that best friend that we can relay on for anything is just as important as having a group of best friends that do most everything together. What makes friendships last is the quality of the relationship. I had been talking to a client (who is also a good friend) today about the fact that with age our friend groups seems to stop growing in numbers but instead start growing in importance. We noticed that we may not see our friends all of the time but when we do see them the amount of time spent with them seems longer. What hit me when we talked about this was the fact that I had gone to this friend’s house to help her dog with some pain issues, which maybe took me 15 minutes to do, the other 30-45minutes was spent talking with this wonderful lady. Which then made me think of this other friendship that I have, this is how it has been a part of my life:
A few years back (about 38 years to be exact) there was these two little girls. They both went to the same school but different kindergarten classrooms. They played with each other on the playground and sat near each other at storytime. They were friends. Fast forward a couple of years, these same two girls, not always in the same classes in school but will still find each other on the playground to play and introduce each other to some other kids that would become part of their friend group. These two girls did elementary school together, middle school and high school. They had friends come and go from their friend group, but they made sure to always be friends. Their friendship worked so well because they needed each other. One was outgoing, beautiful inside and out, energetic and willing to try new things. The other was equally beautiful inside and out, but was much more reserved, relied on her outgoing friend to make friends and was more than willing to be the behind the scenes type of person. When high school finished they went their separate ways for college but still stayed in touch. Each girl visited the other in their respective colleges and when it was finally time to settle down in a town though they were far apart from each other, they would visit and have those type of phone calls that would last for hours. The quality of this friendship was so good and strong, that the two ended up living in the same town, living like sisters, blessed with the fact that their kids call them aunts. It’s a lifetime friendship.
Now I cannot talk about friendships without bringing my sister into the discussion. I realize there are those out in the world that have never had the privilege of having a relationship so strong that to live without it would be almost impossible. So other than my husband who is my best friend and God who is my only friend I can trust 100%, my sister is the one person that knows everything about me. To be honest I think she even knows when I burp funny. She and I are different in so many ways that in the end that is what makes us get along so well. Her opinion matters to me, but I love to get her riled. When we both want to do the same thing, I find it is my ultimate duty to make sure she knows that it is a competition and there will be trash talk happening. When I had a very hard time at work, I knew that she would talk me through it. I love that my oldest daughter is a mini version of my sister. I love it more that my sister says my middle child is a mini version of me. My sister and I have not lived in the same state in over 20 years but we talk to each other weekly. It’s a lifetime friendship.
The friendships that can stand the test of time are the best for sure but there are also those friendships that see you through a season in your life. Once that season is over, the person quietly steps back but is still a friend, moves to the category of lifetime friendship, or fades to the background because of changing circumstances. These are not bad friendships, to be honest they are some of the best kinds because you learn and grow from these friendships in ways you might not realize with a friendship that has been ongoing for years. When my husband and I were in our first years of parenthood, we worked opposite shifts so that the kids could have one of us at home with them, but there were times that our schedules would overlap and we would have to have someone babysit. We were blessed with being introduced to a lady we to this day still call Grandma Judy. She took our kids whenever we needed her to and she would take them even when we didn’t. She and her husband loved our kids like their own grandkids. In our minds they were family. As our kids grew older they were able to be at home by themselves more so Grandma Judy started to move out of the picture more, but not out of our hearts. Today we don’t see Grandma Judy much, but the friendship we have with her and her husband is still strong. She was there for us during a season in our lives when we really needed her, we were blessed by her and her husband. She is a lifetime friend.
What kind of friend are you to the people around you? To that end I ask myself what kind of friend am I to those who I know? Making a friendship work and last a long time takes work, love, and dedication to each other. We were not made to be alone in this world. We were made for relationships. We were made for community. Even the most introverted person has his/her “people” that make up the tribe. Remember we are who we hang out with so we might as well make it count. Until next time her is a song that has been special to me and my lifelong friends for so many years:
Every morning I wake up to a world of chaos. My chaos is different than yours and the way I deal with it is different as well.
This morning my chaos was started in the form of a little while dog that really wanted to be released from her kennel. It meant choosing to get out of bed to go and open hers. Once she was “released” the excitement doubled. Charlie loves this time every morning because she gets to get her favorite toy to then jump on our bed to say good morning. This routine has been in play since we adopted Charlie, but the versions of her excitement change often. It is a crazy but wonderful way to start the day.
What would happen though if Charlie were a human? Would I have as much patience with her and would I think it was such a wonderful way to start each day? Obviously a human wouldn’t be let “free” from their kennel, but what if all the other aspects were true? I find I give the animals in my home more grace than I do the people in my life. That is an awfully sad thing to say, but I reason it with my animals don’t know any better while people should.
My children this morning decided to have an argument about dirty dishes that were supposed to be clean. My eldest loves to school my youngest in the importance of doing things right the first time (probably due to all the times I had to teach her the importance). The problem is she will start to get herself worked up about it while my youngest has an attitude of indifference. He really could care less if something isn’t perfectly clean, in his mind he got the job done, so move on. As the “conversation” gets heated, I feel the temperature rise with my patience. It ends with two people annoyed and one young man knowing he should care, but can say he probably doesn’t. The chaos of this morning, if I chose to allow it to could paint the picture for the rest of my day. It takes an active decision to let it go for this moment of chaos to not bother further.
1Corinthians 13: 4-7 is why we should chose in a world of chaos to be a steady “eb and flo” kind of person. It is not a choice that is easy, but when chaos is going on all around what is the point in added to the fire. People who are in the midst of chaos are looking for a solid stronghold to cling to. Christ should be their answer, but sometimes it takes a person who is trying to learn and be like Christ that they see first. That person can then lead them to Christ and the stronghold that He is. Christ is love and He shows us what to do in the midst of confusion and turmoil:
Love suffers long and is KIND; love does not envy; love does not parade itself; is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek it’s own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the TRUTH; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails. 1Corinthians 13: 4-7 We are not Christ thankfully, and so all we can strive to be is like Christ. People just know that in the calm of the storms they are searching and grabbing for something, anything that is calm. We see this in social media, we see it when people don’t want to leave their homes because the world says it’s not safe to. Christ walked into may situations in which chaos ruled, fear abounded and life was not ok. Wherever He went though people could feel the peace and love that exuded from Him. He didn’t get caught up in the latest conflicts, instead He stayed true to who He was which was love. Shouldn’t we follow in His footsteps? Until next time:
And still, after all this time, the sun never says to the earth, “You owe me”.
Look what happens with a love like that, it lights the whole sky
Hafiz
Rae’s New Shine Children’s Book
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
One ounce of sunshine and the next thing you know we are planning the backyard parties, the clean up days and trips on the motorcycles.
This winter/spring was a long one. To say cabin fever set in is an understatement. My kids were bored, my dogs were antsy and there just wasn’t enough to do inside, besides telling the kids to clean their rooms for the umpteenth hundredth time. Don’t get me wrong we played board games, did some winter fun stuff and watch a lot of movies, but there comes a time when it is just better to be outside.
This past weekend felt like we were taking all of our pent up cabin feverness and letting loose. We actually had decent weather so what does my eldest child do? She invites six of her friends over to have dinner, cake (birthday girl was in the friend group), movies and a trip to the roller rink. All within two days. My youngest decides he and some friends need to head to a new laser tag place and the hubby starts the process of “summerizing” the deck. Needless to say we are ready for that big fireball in the sky to stop hiding behind the clouds. Summer can come at anytime!
I am a summer/fall kind of girl. I have been working hard not to go crazy this winter/spring because I know that we need the moisture, but why does it have to be so cold? I am actually excited to get my hands dirty cleaning up the backyard. I am excited to sleep on a semi-soft air mattress when we go camping. I am excited to hang laundry out on the line. Heck I have a whole area in my closet for the sundresses that I have acquired. I am even making it a goal to not wear my scrubs when I am not at work.
There is definitely something mentally that happens when the sun is out more than the clouds. I know there is scientific data that shows being outside and getting some sun is great for your health (wear sunscreen please), even when the sweat is pouring. Just think of it this way, how wonderful is it that the screen doors can be used to let in the gentle breeze, balloons can be filled with water for the simple purpose of launching them at your unsuspecting kids, and when your white dog needs a bath you can do it with the garden hose.
If you can’t tell, I am ready. I am ready to do more than work, and more than bundling up in 5 thousand layers of clothing just to stay warm. How about you? What are you looking forward to? Until next time:
You are my sunshine, my only sunshine! You make me happy when skies are grey…….
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
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Spring is almost here. Where I live we are in our 2nd to 3rd “spring”. Our weather loves to throw us for a loop and tease us with warm weather for a weekend and then hit us with a snowstorm. This is the sole reason why we can’t start planting outdoors until close to Memorial Day weekend. It is quite sad for the novice gardener who is so excited to get out into the garden.
Over the years I have learned some things when it comes to starting a garden, the main one was: don’t assume new plants are hardy enough to withstand harsh temperatures. My first year my plants did not survive. To this day I am still learning new tricks and traits on making a garden grow. The one thing that is a sure thing, weeds don’t need to be planted, they will just grow on their own. By definition though a weed is any plant that you don’t want in your garden.
This last year I thought I had it all figured out. I purchased raised garden boxes and went to the local garden store to purchase soil that I could grow fruits and veggies in. I bought plants from people in the area that had already acclimated the plants to the outdoors (since I have no desire to start plants from seed, due to my inability to make them grow), and I asked for advice on how to keep these plants alive. Then I learned that the advice I asked was partially good advice. The soil I purchased didn’t allow any aeration so when I put in the healthy happy plants they struggled to gain a hold in the soil. Unfortunately it took the whole growing season to realized this, but with some failure comes growth. Near the end of summer I came to the conclusion that no amount of watering could aerate the soil. What did grow? Weeds. Granted not in the raised beds but in the soil around the beds.
These plants had been growing in the area until the time that I decided that I needed to remove them for the beds I wanted to install. They flourished in the soil they had available, but I didn’t want them to be there any more. I wanted something that I felt would be better, something that would help me be better. I wanted to remove what I saw as bad so that I could grow something good. Funny how this is also life. Weeds will always be in a garden. Discontentment will always be in our lives. If we want a garden to grow what we choose, we have to work at removing the weeds, fertilizing the soil and creating an area in which the wanted plants will thrive. It takes work to be content.
I want to be content in my life. I don’t want to want things, or to covet what others have. I want to live a life that is pleasing to God, but it takes work. Paul in Philippians talks about being able to live knowing what it felt to be poor as well as prosperous. He knew both ends of the spectrum and he found that being content with what God gave him was the best thing he could do. Paul’s garden had weeds but over his life he worked at tending his soil and removing the bad from it. The plants that he grew nourished so many people. Isn’t that the point of a garden? Even a garden of flowers nourishes the soul.
What kind of garden would you grow? Would you let the weeds overtake the plants that were purposely planted? Would you make sure the soil could support healthy growth? Would you take the time to tend to your garden? If you would do this for a garden, would you not do it for your life? Until next time:
Your mind will always believe everything you tell it. Feed it faith. Feed it truth. Feed it with love.
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
This past week I was taught a lot about not being in control. This doesn’t usually sit well with me but then it usually doesn’t when one thinks that control is a natural occurrence.
As my daughter and I were driving to an appointment she had we were discussing the fact that there were certain criteria that she had to meet before this appointment could happen. This meant that she had to take her earrings out, take off her fake nails and she had to not eat or drink at least 6 hours before this appointment. Of course, this means that she was going into a surgery of some sort, if this wasn’t guessed. My daughter is just like me though, she does not like having control over the situations she is in. She knows this procedure must happen, she also knows that she must follow their protocols because it keeps her safe and prevents things (aspiration) from happening. What she doesn’t like is the time in which she is under anesthesia, she doesn’t know what is going on.
Now granted she has seen surgeries happen before because she has helped me in my work, she knows what happens before, during and after, but this is happening to her, so it is different. As I sit here, I am understanding this same fear of no control. I am her momma sitting in a waiting room waiting for her procedure to be done. I tend to go to the “bad what if” scenarios always thinking the worst. Maybe it’s the line of work I am in or the fact that my brain is somewhat negative in thoughts and needs the retraining of positive thoughts. In any case, I sit here, and I wait. My best course of action would be to stay positive and know all is well, and I am working on staying in that mindset. What would be better? Knowing and fully grasping that God is in control and that in itself is all I need to know.
Our trip over here was right before Easter. The scenario in which it seemed God was not in control at all, but it was when He was literally in the thick of it all. Easter is all about God sending His son to save us all. If I were alive in that time, I would be one nervous, wreck. The world seemed to be in such a state of disarray and yet in the middle of it all there was the calm of Christ. When everything was going wrong Christ was the right. He still is. He is in the midst of everything that happens. He is in control, even when us control freaks try and take back control He is there.
This last week I did a lot of travelling, I did a lot of work, I did a lot of planning, prepping and sighing. There was a perception of control, but ultimately my sanity was in God’s hands. My peace was because I put my hope in the one who created me. I have no control right now with my daughter’s procedure. We prayed before we went into the building, and I am praying while I wait. The is all I can do and that is the best I can do. Prayer in not my afterthought, it is my constant conversation with Christ. There is control in that, because there is a relationship of trust. That I can handle and thank God for that! Until next time:
Your worst enemy isn’t a person, situation, or thing. It’s the story in your mind based on assumptions and projected fears or insecurities.
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
Today my daughter was braver than me. She did something that I am not willing to do and she faced this challenge head on without fear in her eyes. She was the one that even suggested that this challenge be done. My sister (who she is visiting) didn’t even bat an eye when this challenge was suggested, which makes me question why I would trust her with my offspring, but I do. Just the thought of what they did makes me want to gag but I never said my daughter was normal. So this thing that they did, it’s not new to my sister and her husband so they should have known better, but they still allowed it. They had sushi for dinner! GAG! UGH! GROSS!
Yes I know this is my opinion and there are a lot of people out there that love sushi. I know it can be healthy and it can have a good taste (thought I highly doubt it) and I know that I am proud of my super picky child for trying it. I am not that brave and I am ok with that. In all honesty though who wouldn’t want their child to be brave and to try something new. There is a whole world out there of amazing and wonderful things to experience and try.
While visiting with my sister she asked me if I had ever thought about what my best birthday would look like. I had to admit that I had never actually thought about it. She on the other hand had hers planned out with what she would eat where she would go and how she would spend her weekend. All she wanted was someone to do it with her. I must say it sounded wonderful and I was a bit jealous that she took the time to plan it out. Even now, I wouldn’t be able to say what my best birthday would be, don’t get me wrong, I love the homemade cakes and the presents from my kids and hubby but is there something out there that I would absolutely love to do? I am gonna say yes, I just don’t know what it is.
How wonderful would it be to sit and imagine and plan and think of different things to do? What’s stopping me from doing this? What would stop anyone from doing this? Excuses. My daughter could have made excuses for not trying sushi, I feel like I make excuses all the time for not doing the things I should do. I am too tired, I am too busy, I can just do what I always do. What would happen if we saw opportunities to do things and actually did them. A friend of mine loves to take pictures of nature, and water. She has talent, and instead of letting the pictures sit on her computer/phone she decided to put them out there for the world to see. Scary? Yes! Now she has some of her pictures published in a magazine. If she didn’t take the opportunity to share what she loved she wouldn’t have felt the joy of others loving her talent.
We tend to be the main force in stopping opportunities from happening. We get scared, we don’t have enough money, we don’t have enough time. The list can go on and on. Adventures are missed, experiences don’t happen, growth stops. I am so glad this same sister that allowed my daughter to eat gross raw fish, encouraged me to do some of the many adventures I have done. I love that my kids (with some nudging) are willing to try new experiences. Who wants to live a life full of regrets? I promise this, even if the opportunity falls doesn’t go as planned there is always something that can come from it. Until next time:
Be brave enough to suck at something new
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
This has happened multiples times now, someone seems to be upset about something but it actuality they just want to be heard. The act of putting out fires used to be something that was intimidating to me. I hated it when I had to talk to someone that was upset. In my line of work it was usually over an overpayment, a service that was supposedly missed or a fear that they didn’t feel was addressed at the appointment.
Over the last few years especially since Covid hit companion animals have become more our children than just pets. Owners have started to identify as pet parents and there are more and more pets that have bigger and cuter wardrobes than most people have. Pets have become family members, but ones that cannot talk for themselves, and definitely can’t tell us if something isn’t right. So that job becomes the job of their owners, who try their hardest to do right by their animals. So when said owner feels that their pet didn’t get the right or the best treatment from the veterinary professionals they have to stand up for them in that circle too.
I commend the owners that will speak up and get to the bottom of the perceived problem, and I am not saying that veterinary professionals don’t make mistakes, but from what I have experienced it comes down communication, or miscommunication. This doesn’t just happen in the vet world. Communication is so important and when it’s done wrong, confusion happens, frustration happens and eventually people just get angry.
When I was new to the vet world one of my mentors took over a call that no one in the office wanted to take. The client was upset and she was starting to get rude to whoever picked up the phone. When she was placed on hold for the second time (the poor receptionist was just trying to get more information) my mentor who had overheard the conversation that had taken place decided to take action. She proceeded to get on the phone with the person, who started yelling at her, so when she could talked she would talk in a whisper. She kept doing this until eventually the lady on the other end had to quiet down herself just to hear my friend. The problem didn’t get fully resolved in that one phone call but we were able to get to the root of the issue when the client was forced to calm down in order for us to help.
This stuck with me. People want to be heard, but that doesn’t mean they get to be rude in the process. Fear and frustrations can drive the conversations if we allow them too. When someone feels an injustice was done to them or one of their loved ones the weapons come out and the walls go up. The only way to get through to them is to have patience and to allow them to speak their mind without taking it personally. This is not easy but a resolution usually can be obtained. We don’t always get to chose the interactions we have on any given day, but we do get to chose the way we respond to them. This can be anywhere from saying thank you to someone that complements you to having patience with someone who is having a bad day. My kids get to hear this from me all the time: “you have the right to be upset, happy, sad or mad. It’s how you respond to these emotions that will define who you are” Until next time:
Your worst enemy isn’t a person, situation, or thing. It’s the story in your mind based on assumptions and projected fears or insecurities.
Anonymous
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
It’s that time of year again, we have gone through our first spring, second winter, are now into our second spring because where we live the weather is a fickle being. Today was the warmest it has been in a few weeks at a balmy 53 degrees so that prompted me to get my cleaning supplies out to start some spring cleaning. Now granted there wasn’t an appearance of shorts and tank tops but I got to at least wear a lighter set of jeans with an actual shirt, not a sweatshirt. I am starting to get hopeful that the cold is coming to an end, which was so encouraging that I decided to clean because that’s what normal people do right?
My family has a habit of scattering when I start to do the “mom cleaning”. Since I have clear memories of doing this as a kid I know this phenomenon is not something new. Now of course my way of thinking was that it wouldn’t take me long to get this deep cleaning done since the chores we give our kids include things like dusting, sweeping and moping. I now understand the scattering of the kids and the hubby. I found dust in places that if routine dusting was being done wouldn’t have had dust. The floor under the table had more dust bunnies than you would find in a bunny colony. The sinks had some type of film on them that came off easily with a little bit of “elbow grease”. Now in the defense of the family we are all pretty busy with school and work, but not so busy that chores couldn’t get done right. I guess this is why “spring cleaning” happens.
Ranting aside, it is so satisfying to have a clean house. It’s energizing, and there is a weight that feels like it is lifted off my shoulders when I get a handle on the piles and dust that starts to accumulate. I admit there are still places that I haven’t gotten to but there is also a part of me that doesn’t want to overstress about the fact that I have taken a whole Saturday to clean three rooms. So what is it that causes these energized feelings? Probably the fact that I have control again of my environment. I have pride in the fact that things are cleaned and organized. My stove top is white again and my black countertops don’t have a layer of dust behind the appliances that are strategically placed on it. My house smells clean and the white shirt I wore (yes, a pretty white shirt) is still white and there are not any weird stains on it. Now that most of the house is clean the family has felt safe enough to converge again in the living room. I can now work on other projects, without the stress of mess weighing me down. I love this feeling. Yes I could have gone outdoors and done something fun, but as I stated earlier I am hopeful that the cold is coming to an end, but that time isn’t here yet and 53 degrees is still cold in my book, so I will patiently wait for that warmer day to come. Until next time:
How to handle stress like a dog:
If you can’t eat it, or play with it, then pee on it and walk away
Unknown
Rae’s New Shine Children’s Book
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
We may noticed the negative and bad that is around us, but are we so observant that we also see that from our hearts can come things/thoughts that are more of a mess?
And He said, "What comes out of a man, that defiles a man. For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications, murder, thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lewdness, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness. All these evil things come from within and defile a man." Mark 4:20-23
That is a lot of bad things, things that the people around us may not know is going on in our hearts because they can’t see or hear it. Things that may be going on in their own hearts. Most people want to be good, and try to control the thoughts that they have, but no one is that strong. The heart is what is the center of us and our tongues are the strongest muscle in our bodies. We have the ability to tear down or build up simply by what we allow to rule our hearts and what we allow our words to say.
As I was doing a devotion the other day, the author talked about how mediaeval monasteries would try and keep all of the “bad” of the world out by building up walls and living in “peace” within those walls. The problem was the monks were still humans, and sin doesn’t just stop at a wall. If we could just tell the “bad” to stop at our front doors we wouldn’t have families that fall apart, children who feel alone and people who feel as though they have nothing to give. If we could just tell all the evil things to just stop we wouldn’t need Jesus.
When I was in charge of the Jr./High school youth group we did a study once about words and actions. We talked about how we could bring joy to someone’s day by saying hello and smiling at them. We talked about how important it was to acknowledge a person by looking them in the eye and knowing their name. On the flip side we discussed how when someone is torn down or gossiped about it’s like crinkling up a piece of paper and telling someone to make it flat again. It’s just not possible. One activity we did that dealt with spreading kindness had to do with glitter. Yes, I know glitter should never have been invented but since it was I used it to my advantage. I had the students hold out their hands so that I could place some glitter onto their palms. Their one job was to remove the glitter from their hands completely without spreading it to other people or the furniture/floor. The person who could successfully do this would win a prize. Needless to say, I got to eat the candy at the end of the exercise since no one could do it. The point was, like glitter, kindness can stick to someone just was much as cruelty, so why not spread kindess instead.
We as humans have to constantly work at what we allow into our hearts. What we listen to, how we treat people, what we allow ourselves to think about all contribute to the health of our hearts. We can’t just separate ourselves from sin and bad, so while we are in the middle of life why not find ways to change what influences us. Until next time:
When no one is watching ,live as if someone is. Succeed at home first. Pray twice as much as you fret. Listen twice as much as you speak. God has forgiven you; you’d be wise to do the same. Never let the important be the victim of the trivial.
Why do I feel so alone sometimes? I wake up knowing I am going to be surrounded by loved ones. I know I will be going to work where there are people there that are loved ones. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t talk to someone or multiple someones and yet the feeling of being alone still hits hard. In the race to keep up with life’s responsibilities the person I am gets lost in the mix and because of that loss it’s hard to get back to the person I am. This is where the feeling of aloneness happens even in a crowded room. I can bet that everyone at some point feels this. It’s not something that has an easy fix but maybe there ways to start finding an answer.
Romans 8:31-39 does touch on this. If you know the Bible this is the passage in which it says in verse 38-39:
For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Basically it’s saying nothing can separate us from God, I truly believe this but I still feel “alone”. If I were to really be honest though, my feeling of “alone” has more to do with being exhausted with the things in which I have placed in my life. There is no downtime in which I just allow myself to have no expectations, no rules no requirements of my time. Even on my “slower days” I have the ever present self guilt of not being busy enough. I do not find my rest in the Lord, and so I forget that I am worthy of just being me because I don’t have to work for anything when I trust that God loves me and will not allow anything to separate me from him.
Our world at present is so inundated with information, with ways to be better, to make more money. We are given so much of this knowledge and “know how” that we just keep pushing forward. It’s the mentality of what can I do that will better my situation which will thus better the society in which I live? We keep gathering and gathering more information, sometimes without realizing we are gathering. My son just told me the other day that a hamster’s brain is the size of his fingernail. I asked where he got this information and of course he said the internet. Is this fact true? Honestly I don’t know, but it’s now a tidbit of information that he has given me. He was able to repeat the information but did he check to see if it was accurate? My bet is no.
So then what if we had someone that could show us how to be productive but also take time to turn off the noise and find out who we really are? This person would be someone that we could learn from but not in a classroom, but in life. We see what they do and we learn to integrate it into our own lives. This person would show us how to be ourselves by being true to who they are. We would be successful in life because we would be taught to have balance and to love as we want to be loved. Wouldn’t it be amazing to have someone who would volunteer their time to guide us and teach us what it’s like to be who we were made to be? Oh and if we screw up, that’s just part of the learning, since we will learn from it, and there is no guilt allowed. To me that sounds amazing! Good thing we already have that person, we just have to get past the blinders we have on and see that Christ wants to be that someone. We just have to chose to let Him lead.
The times in which I feel most alone is when I have created an environment of chaos. I am always on the go or my mind is always turned on to the things of the world. I am most connected to who I am when I unplug and I pull out my Bible and I start talking to God. When I think I can do it on my own I am being selfish, and unwise. My “Joy meter” is on empty and that is felt to the core. It’s in this time that Romans 8:38-39 rings truer than true. Until next time:
Never be impatient with your circumstances, never lose your calm in any situation, never be in a hurry when making important decisions of life; your impatience can ruin everything, instead be patient, pray and let time time take it’s own course.
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
It felt so good to try something new. To accomplish something that even a few years ago I didn’t think I could do without spending hours behind the scenes to figure out how to get the end product. I love to design I have come to realize. I may be re-creating something I have seen somewhere before but usually I am able to put my own spin on it. I don’t know about you but there have been so many times in which I will see something in a store and think “I can make that” just to find out that it’s a bit harder than what I first thought. But now with the wonder of the internet there are so many programs out there that help in the design process. I have been using one of these programs for years since it was especially helpful when I was making up flyers for children’s events I would co-host for church functions. There was always a certain look I wanted, as well as a certain level of professionalism, and I always seem to get it when in this program. So I wasn’t surprised when I was getting it again with my new endeavors.
Before you start to wonder if this is an ad for design programs, it’s not. I just love the feeling of trying something new and realizing it opens up some corner of your brain that you didn’t know was closed. In the world I currently reside in, there is a lot of structure and schedules. This is not bad, actually it is quite necessary when kids and a husband are involved. Most of the time though our nights are the same thing: dinner, clean up, share about our days, then it’s off to do our own things. When listed out like this it seems quite boring, but we are a busy family and the time we spend together is cherished. All too often though the phone comes out and the “scrolling” starts to happen, so one day after I had spent way to much time looking at cute baby cows and working dogs actually working I decided to make a change.
In my family if someone initiates change people follow along. Take for example one night I put my phone down, grabbed a coloring book and some colored pencils and I sat at the table and started to color. About 15 minutes later my son came out with some paints and a canvas, and my oldest daughter got out her Perler beads and started organizing them. We got to talking and soon we realized that the time flew by. So when I started to design things like t-shirts, phone cases and tote bags I started to ask for my family’s opinions. I then started to have them send me photos so I could try and do some designing with them. My new “hobby” is far from perfect but I am able to use my brain and my abilities instead of going dead to the world by scrolling.
The act of creating is amazing. It’s a rush of endorphins when you get the right look or you find a new tool that helps you design better. It’s even more of a jump in the “happy juices” when someone takes what you have made and loves it. I am excited to keep creating, I am excited to keep sharing what I created (Joyfully Living Goods). This new hobby won’t define me but it will be something that helps me be the person I am. If you have something you have been putting off because it may be “too much work” or you are “too busy”, I say change your priorities. Try something new, it could be something that you love and you wished you would have started sooner. Until next time:
A champion is someone who shows up and puts in the work, no matter how the odds are stacked against them.
Rich Froning
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
The first time I even imagined going on a zipline excursion I was terrified. I had been told over and over that it was a lot of fun, that the views were amazing and that it was safe. I had watched videos of other people doing the different adventures hoping it would help calm my nerves. I even thought it would be easier if I did it with someone who had done it before. The amount of “noise” in my head that came from the worries and fears of trying this new and potentially dangerous activity was almost overwhelming. Some of the days before the reservation date came, the “noise” was louder than on other days. I think on those days even if someone was talking to me about how easy and safe it was I wouldn’t be able to hear them. In the end I knew if I was going to try a zipline experience I would have to get out and be with the ones that had the experience, which meant I had to somehow figure a way to hear their voices over the fears in my mind.
I would love to say the first time I ziplined that it was easy to step off the ledge. I could physically see that I was safe, I knew I had a harness on and that I was triple attached to safety devices, but my brain was trying to contemplate the fact I had to trust some college aged adrenaline junkie to make sure I arrived safely at the end of the course. It was a leap of faith, I had to listen to their voices and do as they instructed. The first course I did was in Alaska, the next two I did after that were in Hawaii and one on Catalina Island. Needless to say it was trusting the ones that knew the outcome was arriving safely at the end of the course while having as much fun along the way.
Fear has a way of ruling over us. It becomes a loud noise within our minds. Anger, pain and anxieties can be the same way. Sometimes we really can’t control the loudness. We wonder where God is in all of the noise. We wonder why our prayers are not being answered, and if maybe we are just not good enough for them to be answered. Jesus is always in the mix of everything. In Mark 6:45-52 Christ’s disciples were told to go to across the Sea of Galilee. The problem was they were rowing (actually for about 8 hrs) against strong headwinds and a major storm. They were getting nowhere and they were scared and tired. I can only imagine how loud it was being in that storm. They were doing what Christ had told them to do and yet they had major difficulties (the storm) preventing them from accomplishing their task. Now think about this, if Christ wanted to take away their difficulties He could have just prayed a prayer and calmed the storm, but instead what He does is what He will and does do for us. He went out to them. Not in a boat, but He did the miraculous and walked on water to get to them. So what does this tell us? We may beg, plead and pray that He take away the difficulties in our lives, but maybe what He wants to do instead is be there with us through the difficult times so that we may feel His presence and know He will be with us whether in good or bad times.
What if instead of taking that first leap of faith on the zipline course I decided instead to forgo the fear and anxiety and let the guides do the course for me. You know live vicariously through them? What if the disciples said “Nah, I don’t really want to get in that boat today Jesus, there might be a storm that harms us” What if? For me and the ziplining I wouldn’t have experienced an adventure with rope bridges, beautiful views and the thrill of the adventure. For the disciples, they would have missed out on the miracles of Jesus and seeing that He has the power to love, save and support. Sometimes when we want to hear Jesus the most, or have Him be near to us we need to lessen the noises in our heads, and realize that He has been with us the whole time in the quiet of a whisper, in the hug of a friend, or even in the leap of faith. Until next time:
If someone is on your mind, pray for them. God may have put them on your mind for a reason
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
Everyone hates to go to the DMV. You just know that you have to show up at a certain time, to just grab a number to hopefully find a seat within the waiting area. Then there is the fear that you forgot something important at home that they are going to say you have to have, to be able to sign a certain paper in order to transfer a title to your cousins’ best friend. We have to go through all the steps and sign in just the right spots or we are sent away to try again. What makes it worse, is the DMV does not need us. We need them if we want a license, to be able to legally drive a car and so on. We don’t like the DMV because no matter how much we hate it, our lives can be alter by this state department. We don’t have control.
There are people out there in the world that actually like being told what to do. That is where they feel comfortable and that is ok for them. For the rest of us we really can’t stand when we are told “no” or “wait”. We don’t like to be scolded, we don’t like to be corrected whether over something big or small. It takes a “big person” to be mature enough to accept when these things happen without getting upset. Control is lost when someone points out something they feel as not correct in someone else’s life. Most often the first response is to get defensive or to redirect the correction to something else, instead of taking responsibility for what is being said and looking into it further. It could be that you were right all along, and could teach the other person instead.
My boss recently came up with a plan to encourage team members to remember to put credits on certain client’s accounts. She was going to give away a prize after a predetermined time frame to the person that remembered to give the credits the most. It was a great idea and gave team members a chance to compete and our clients won in the end too. One day my boss was talking to me, telling me that I couldn’t be a part of the competition because I was a “leader” and so it wouldn’t be fair, but she then preceded to tell me it was probably better anyways because out of everyone on the team I was the worst at forgetting these credits. My first response of course was an excuse, but then I conceded that she was probably right. Granted in this situation it really didn’t bother me too much that I was the worst, but what if she had told me that I wasn’t doing as good of a job as I should be based on my experience in answering the phones or some other task? I guarantee I would have be a lot more defensive, and had more excuses to give.
We have it in our minds the level in which we do certain jobs or tasks. We may think we are doing pretty good but then someone comes along and tells us differently. It hurts our feelings, it makes us mad and gets us frustrated. Kind of like going to the DMV, you get to the counter and “did you bring your birth certificate?” or “it looks like you didn’t pass your driving test”, or even better “did you bring the form that let’s us know you are who you say you are?” is asked or stated. Man is that frustrating, maddening and hurtful. Do the good people at the DMV strive to do these things? No, but then do we as patrons strive to make mistakes? Here’s what I am getting at: there is not a single person in this beautiful world that is perfect. Should we strive to be the best we can be? Of course, but when it comes to what we do in this space we occupy, grace should be handed out in barrels. We could be like the DMV and say we don’t need people, people need us, but that would be the wrong attitude to have. Grace allows us to learn and grow, make mistakes and strive to do better. It allows others those same freedoms. Until next time:
A mistake that makes you humble, is better than an achievement that makes you arrogant
Unknown
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
As a family we went snow tubing recently. We have a lake close by that has this hill. They groom the hill to have 6 lanes with berms separating them in which people grab a tube, step on a conveyor belt that brings them to the top of the hill just to race down the hill on the said tubes. Once at the bottom the process gets started over again. You do this over and over again, and while you are going up the hill you can watch the people go down the hill. The sport of it is, who can go down the fastest and who can jump the berms the best without taking themselves or other people out in the process. You start to get the feeling of which lanes are actually faster and if you go down on your belly vs. your butt if you can gain speed. Most of the time people end up in other lanes and sometimes there are wipeouts, but as a collective whole the people tubing understand the “risks” and still go flying down the hill.
On this trip one of my children had reservations about going down the hill due to the wipeout he had had last year. He thought for certain it would happen again, to the point that he let me know he was fine being at the bottom of the hill taking pictures vs. getting to the top to make a purpose for those pictures. I understood his reservations but secretly hoped he would at least try a couple of times before planting himself in a chair at the bottom. To my surprise we arrived, he grabbed a tube, got to the top of the hill and didn’t stop until we had to go. It was a proud momma moment for me only because he decided himself to step out of his fears and just go for it.
This is a topic I talk with my kids often about, stepping away from what makes them fearful and anxious to try something new. They won’t experience life if they allow fear to rule them. Sounds like good advice huh? It is so hard to follow sometimes especially when you are looked at for the example. The tubing hill wasn’t very big in comparison other tubing hills out there. When we had gone it was a time in which a lot of young families were there as well. I am talking young kids ages 2-5 years old being asked to be brave as their parents hold on tight and they both go flying down the hill. One little girl in particular got to the top without issues but once the prospect of going down the hill on a tube was placed in front of her she froze. Then the tears came and there was no amount of consoling from her dad that could convince her she needed to go flying. After the third attempt at trying to convince her she would be safe in dad’s arms he finally asked the attendant how he could get off the hill. Sadly the way he was told was more difficult that just hoping in a tube and sailing down, but his daughter had made the choice for him and so they set off through the woods lining the lanes to hoof it down to the bottom.
The little girl’s fear was rational in her mind and she put her foot down. Her father’s knowledge that they would be safe in the tube together could not get pushed past the barrier she had put up. Fear does that to us. We get tunnel vision, we see the fear or the problem and only that and we miss the opportunities that could help us to overcome the fears. In more ways that I can count we are like the little girl, but what I would hope is that we would look our fear in the face and do what my son did and overcome it.
When we finished tubing for the day, I asked my son if he had fun, in which he replied “Yes!” and then followed up with the question of when we could go tubing again. When I look back over the years, months, weeks or even days and see moments in which I allowed my fears and anxieties to overcome me, it’s in those times that I had put barriers up that made me not hear my Father telling me I would be safe. Christ doesn’t ever leave us, but when we are so consumed in our fears, in our way of living, in our judgements, we can’t hear His voice. Sometimes this means that we have to take the hard way “down the hill” but even there we are never alone. Imagine the pure joy we would have if we trusted, listened for His voice and even if we were anxious, scared or doubtful we went into His arms because when there we are safe.
When facing your mountains are you looking for the hills in which you can overcome them in the safe embrace of Christ’s love? Until next time:
I’m not telling you it’s going to be easy, I’m telling you it will be worth it
unknown
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
My daughter has started to play chess a lot more recently. She has had an interest in it for a little while but she surprised me at Christmas time when she asked for a chess board of her own. From that time on she slowly started to play it more and more, to the extent that she asked if I would play with her at least once a week. When I was younger I remember my dad playing chess so much, sometimes by himself other times with friends. I never understood what the big deal was until I started playing my daughter.
This is not hard for me to admit, my daughter is smarter than me, and I think she knows it but plays it off to make me feel better. Granted street smarts she doesn’t quite have but she is intellectual and understands things pretty quickly. Playing chess with her has proven that over and over. At first she was kind enough to let me make the mistakes I made, like moving my castle diagonally or having my pawn get jumped over by my rook, but then she became sinister. I no longer got the helpful treatment I was getting. In all of the games I have played with her I won once, and I think it was because she was sick and not paying attention. I think that was the one and only time I snagged her queen almost right away. From that point on I lost and usually pretty badly. But I don’t mind, it’s not that I am trying to loose, it’s just not a game I am strong in, and that’s ok.
The opportunities that I get to spend with my teenage daughter is worth me loosing a game. I am loving the time I get and what has ultimately happened is that I have gotten my dad and brother involved. In one of my times in which I thought I had a game in my pocket, I was working on getting closer to check mate, I had taken her queen and was working on the other pieces to make a straight line to the main prize, when out of nowhere she bamboozled me and won. I was in a state of shock but I also knew at that point I needed to bring in reinforcements. I called my dad. I made it clear that he needed to play my daughter so that she could learn from someone with experience and actually have a challenging game. Then my brother mentioned he was also playing chess so with that knowledge, games were set up that gave her fun challenges in between her games with me.
My time spent with my daughter playing a game morphed into time spent with family members she doesn’t talk with a whole lot. It created conversations in between my dad and I since my daughter doesn’t answer her phone a whole lot. It ultimately had nothing really to do with the game but more about quality time. I think if one my children asked me to learn to belly dance with them I would do it just to spend time with them. I am not blind to the fact that I have two my kids getting close to the age in which they will start a life of their own. I am taking in all the time I can get with them. I am not one of those parents that wishes they could turn back time, but I am definitely looking for the moments in which I am invited into my kids’ lives and I am relishing in the time spent with them, even if it means learning how to play chess. Until next time:
Continuous improvement is better than delayed perfection
Mark Twain
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
She didn’t want to be thought of in that way, but the way she lived her life always made it appear to the world that she really was what they thought she was. The world would never understand that the wall she put up around her heart, even her life made her seem like she was a person without feelings. It’s not that she had a hard life, she grew up in a loving home, and had friends (though not a lot of them). She grew up in a church that made her feel loved and accepted. Over time though life sank in and hard lessons were learned. She lost trust in people, she lost trust in herself to make choices that would not pile on more problems. She lost some of the faith she had relied on most of her life. So people saw her for the hard exterior she put on, and quite frankly she was sick of it. She wanted a change.
The world loves to label, loves to find value in the things we do rather than who we are as people. Parents want to have their kids succeed, and so they try and encourage their kids, save for college, and be there for them as much as they can. The pressure to have successful kids can sometimes lead to the parents loosing their identity as people who are someone other than a parent. People who own businesses are known for what their business sells. Preachers are known for preaching. Teachers, vets, doctors all the same. But who are they apart from the “profession” they have chosen?
We loose who we are as individuals when we allow the world to label us based on what we do, or how we act. Who we see in the mirror is different than what the world sees when we step into the public eye. Social media shows us what we could have, or how we should look, or even what we should identify as and then anxiety over not having that, or looking like we should, or not being what we’re told we should be makes us put up the walls that protect the inner workings of our heart.
Faith tells us we need to get back to our roots. We need to go back to the One that created us and loves us no matter what. He is the wall breaker, the one we can rely on, and that will look at us at our worst and still gather us up in His arms to let us feel His love and protection. Christ wants us to get back to a brand new way of living. One in which doubt doesn’t rule, worrying isn’t our “go to” response, and fear isn’t something that rules us. We can’t add a single second to our day by worrying over the future. Loving ourselves and others like Christ loves us isn’t easy but walls shouldn’t be erected because we are scared to do it. The world will find a way to think bad about others. It is the nature of humans, we worry, we have fear, we want control of the things in our lives. When we live without the faith we should have in Christ, we don’t have the freedom to show who we really are. We will hide the flaws, we will put up walls, and we will answer with “I’m good, everything is good”.
We are called to be genuine, to love as Christ loves, and to be real with what is going on in our lives. The person in the mirror is important. She is not who the world say she is, she is a child of God, which makes her royalty. Until next time:
A bottle of water can be $1 at the market, $3 at a restaurant, $4 at the movies, and $6 in the airport. It’s the same exact water. The only thing that changed it’s value, was the place. So, the next time you feel like you have no value, maybe you’re in the wrong place.
Unknown
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
We haven’t had snow in a few weeks but one of my favorite things about winter is when there is a fresh layer of snow on the ground. This is when the sun sets the water crystals to sparkle mode and you need sunglasses so that you can look at it. It is pristine and beautiful. It is almost perfect, and then someone takes a step into it, or an animal runs through it. It has just been changed and can never go back to what it was before, which doesn’t necessarily make it bad just changed.
Just as the new snow shows off it’s beauty so can the words that come out of our mouths. They can show the beauty that lies within if we chose to show it. Sometimes though the wrong words come out, and the beauty gets marred, just like the footsteps in the snow. If only we could keep the ugly out of our mouths, but we are not perfect and so we trudge on and instead of seeing what we did as unforgivable, we do our best to mend what was said and work to be better. Just as with the snow, there may be footprints but what if they were made to get to the perfect spot to make a snowman or snow angel? An ugly footprint could lead to something magical.
I don’t know about you but there are days in which I get home from work or from some activity and I process the day and think about my words and actions. Sometimes it’s a “pat on the back” knowing that my filter was on and I didn’t act or saying anything too damaging or embarrassing. On other days it a “slap to the forehead” kind of realization that I said something I shouldn’t have and must apologize for it in the morning. I hate those kind of days, but I do have them so instead of dwelling on them and trying to make them like “new snow” I press forward and hope to find a way to create snowmen.
Words once they leave your mouth cannot be unspoken, actions once done cannot be undone. When we chose to look at the situations we are faced with and try and be as patient as we can be, and as kind as we can be, it may take more work but in the end it is worth it. It’s as if we overlook the footprints so that we can see why they were created. What if what caused the imprints was something of beauty? Have you ever seen a herd of deer quietly existing in a meadow? What if the snow that was disrupted was in a playground in which kids were having fun. What if the words that needed to be said seemed hurtful at the time to the one receiving them, but they were said to help the person grow and be a better person? What if the actions caused hurt but when all things were worked out, the people involved could relate better with each other? Until next time:
Did you know?
No one can destroy iron, but it’s own rust can, likewise no one can destroy a person, but his own mindset can.
unknown
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
A few days ago while I was at work I was reminded that I don’t need to do things on my own. I was working with an animal in which I had to take some xrays of his mouth and then do a dental procedure afterwards. My patient was already sedated but I needed to get ready to do the radiographs by getting my proper protective gear on, set the settings on the machine and get my patient in the right position. I was doing all of this while holding my patient and making sure he was doing ok. Now normally I would have an assistant helping but it was during a time when one was at lunch and one was helping the doctor with another procedure, so I went at the task on my own. My patient decided at the point I had put him down for a second that he would try and run to the front of the hospital, which made a little commotion. My lovely receptionist heard this and came running. When she asked if I needed help, the first thing out of my mouth was “no it’s fine, I got it”, in which she replied “why are you doing this on your own? Let me help”. I would love to say I accepted right away, but instead I thought about it for longer than I should have, and then proceeded to accept her help. With her help my task went so much more smoothly and I was able to get to the dental procedure that much faster.
I am one who has to take time to process my day. So later that night after the work day was done I thought back to that moment, and had to figure out why I didn’t accept her help quicker than what I did. To be honest it didn’t take long to figure out. Pride was a huge contributing factor. If I was able to accomplish the task on my own it was another feather in my hat. I didn’t need help. Another factor was selfishness, if I didn’t have to spend the time explaining to someone how I wanted the job done, I could get done quicker with that task and move on to the procedure that came afterwards I thought I could be faster on my own. My friend (and my life mentor) showed me the errors of my ways when she accepted my apology (that I gave later) and informed me that we both have this problem in our thinking:
We can do this on our own, we don’t need help
What a joy stealer this statement is. We are not made “to do this on our own”. We were made with community in mind. A family member once told me about a problem with their car. It was something that needed to be fixed but the money wasn’t there to get it done at the shop, so in a conversation with a co-worker the problem was brought up, and much to the delight of his pocketbook the co-worker said he could help and even showed him how to fix the problem. Joy is stolen when we get defensive, when we go it alone, when we rely on ourselves vs. trusting that God will provide. This doesn’t mean we don’t need to put in the work. The provision can come from the people we have in our lives, in the moments we take to talk to someone, in the seconds we take to realize that other people do have problems in their own lives they are dealing with and it may not be about us. Accept the help, accept that people in general are good. Accept that Christ came to give us joy, but it is given when we accept that we need to trust Him. Ultimately my task that I was trying to get done by myself took longer, when I thought I could be faster. Ultimately pride and selfishness stole my joy. Joy was found when help was accepted. Joy is lost when you try and make yourself better than others, when you try and go it alone. Confidence in yourself, in your abilities is one thing, but confidence in Christ and in the abilities, and gifts He gave you is where you will find your strength and ultimately your joy. Use this to help others, it’s a firmer foundation than anything you can give on your own. Until next time:
Be there for others, but never leave yourself behind. Use your gifts and your abilities, but give glory to the One who gave them to you.
unknown
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
Every once in while I find a book that is not a normal book I would read, but one that helps in expanding my “happy ratings”. That’s what this latest book was. It was all about things in life that could make you smile. Some of them were odd such as “clear umbrellas. Just because the sky is grey doesn’t mean you don’t want to see it” while others talked about how humans have the capacity to be kind and that it is limitless. Why wouldn’t that make you smile? The book was a quick read, but it did what it set out to do. I smiled at most of the entries that were listed.
Did you know it takes more muscles to frown than it does to smile? When someone does smile it makes their whole face light up. I love when someone that looks as mean as can be turns into a beaming light when they let a smile come through. As I shared some of the entries of the book with my family members I thought about what it is that makes me smile on an average day. Here is a list that I came up with, maybe you’ll find some joy and even smile at some of them:
Sunflowers: Even if they are the fake ones you get from a craft store. They had to have been the poster child of happy flowers when God was creating them
Ice cream: Even better when your child announces that she wants to be a professional ice cream taster when she is older.
Driving somewhere with your favorite co-worker, knowing you’ll get some free therapy and there is no way they can get away. Devious smiles
What’s the longest word in the English language? Smiles——there is miles inbetween
Getting a text from one of your favorite people
Finally getting the package you have been waiting on, especially when it’s something you created yourself and get brings you joy just looking at it.
Finally getting closure on a problem you have been working on for months. Relief smile
Teenagers have a way of holding their parents in this state of shock and awe on what they’ll buy into. So when they think ahead and want to do something good for their future, you give your partner a high five and share a secret smile. Lord knows you don’t want to be cause smiling at something that they thought was a good idea, it may makes them change their minds.
When a 5 year old decides that the game of the night is to see who can stand up the longest after spinning for 2 minutes there is this euphoria smile that happens that is mixed with laughter and stumbling around.
Meeting a friend at a new restaurant and finding that the food really is good.
When the speedometer finally gets over the 50 mph mark after having your teen stuck in the 35-40mph rut for months. It almost makes you want to do a triumphant shout followed by a happy dance, but a small smile will suffice while in their presence.
When someone goes on a trip and comes back saying they have a surprise for you. That meant they thought of you while away. This warrants a warm fuzzy smile.
Asking your sister or brother if we are meeting for our weekly facetime/zoom visits and having them say yes!
Oh I could think of so many more reasons to smile which in itself makes me smile. When the world is getting you down, or you just need a break from life why not sit and list out what makes you smile. I bet it will lift your spirits and help you realize there is more out there than the problems you face right now. Until next time:
Be a hand that reaches out.
Be a smile for those who have no reason to smile.
Be a light for those who live in darkness
Unknown
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
I absolutely hate to wait for things, especially things that are supposed to be fun. You know that time frame right before you are getting ready to leave for a fun date with friends? You can’t leave too soon or you’ll be too early but it’s just so hard to wait the last 10 minutes before it’s really time to go. Children really understand this struggle. Try telling a 5 year old they’re going to get ice cream but they have to wait until you finish the job you are doing. It’s like setting the timer on a bomb waiting for it to explode. I guarantee that little kid is doing their best to be patient but the struggle is almost too much for them.
I am noticing this in more subtle ways as an adult, though most of us are more mature than a five year old it doesn’t mean it’s not hard to wait. This last week I took a break from social media. I do this every so often when I start to notice I am watching videos of cute little cows walking around a barn more than I am interacting with my kids or my husband. It’s not that I mean to, it’s just easier sometimes to zone out after a long day at work. The downside is my family has now gotten used to me zoning out on my phone, and have created a pattern themselves of doing their own “zoning”. Oh the struggle, but if it means that I break the cycle and get interaction again, it’s worth it. In the process of breaking the zoning cycle one thing became clear to me, the things that once held importance in my eyes and the eyes of my family fell to the wayside. This struggle was worth changing but it would take time and of course waiting for habits to change.
The saying “if it’s important enough, you’ll find a way” speaks volumes in that it ultimately means the road won’t be easy but it will be worth it. As adults we wait for bills to be paid, kids to listen, and bosses to understand the struggles we may be having. We also wait for enough money to be saved for the trip we are taking, we wait for the “aha moment” we know our love ones will have, and we wait for the moment in which we can finally relax. It’s not as simple as knowing ice cream is coming, but when these things are important enough we will make them something we strive for just like the 5 year old. Christ waits for us as well. In the struggles we face on a daily basis He offers us relief. Every day we wake up and if you are anything like me, my brain goes into “what are we gonna do today?” mode. If there was something that bothered me from the day before it is in the forefront of my mind as I wake up from my slumber. That’s because it’s important to me, but Christ says to give all our burdens to him and he will give us rest. He is waiting for us to realize that we can do this. Our lives don’t magically become easier but the load on our shoulders does become lighter when we allow Him to help. He doesn’t struggle, nor does He loose patience in us. We are the ones that keep the struggle real, and the patience short.
What are you struggling with today? Does the world seem bigger than the capacity of your thoughts to bear it? Is there a pile of worry you carry around like a noose on your neck? The struggle to wait for relief may be a burden you are not prepared to take on. What if little by little you chip away at the waiting period by learning to release your grasp and let the strength that comes from relying on Christ bring you joy. Until next time:
Be soft. Do not let the world make you hard. Do not let pain make you hate. Do not let bitterness steal your sweetness. Take pride that even though the rest of the world may disagree, you still believe it to be a beautiful place.
Kurt Vonnegut
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
When I was younger I took swimming lessons like most of the kids in my neighborhood. Most of the time it meant walking to the community pool for the lessons and then we would get to swim afterwards in an open swim session. One of the last things we had to do to in our swim class was pass a test that would prove we knew how to do the basics in the water and not drown. For the most part the test was easy, but one of the last things we had to do was dive down to the bottom of the deep end and grab a ring tp bring it up to the surface. We had to show we knew how to dive off the side and thus show that we could hold our breath underwater for a certain time. For most of the kids it was easy, so I didn’t think I would have a problem doing it, except for when I did. After I dove in I was kicking my way to the bottom of the pool when I heard a pop in my ear. I kept going because I really wanted to pass this test (it meant I could get out of the shallow side of the pool where the little kids were, and go to the side where my friends were), which I did, but what I didn’t realize right away was that I did something to my ear.
I had to deal with the consequence of that action for sure but don’t we all? It meant that my hearing in that ear was decreased which meant I would have to work harder at hearing when people talked to me. One of the hardest things to do sometimes is to stop and actually listen to what someone is saying. It means focusing on them, and stopping what you are doing so that your mind can fully concentrate on what is being said. Sometimes that means leaning in, if what is surrounding you is loud, sometimes it means finding a quiet spot to fully grasp the conversation. My husband always knew when I was asleep with my “bad ear” up because, it would take him or one of our kids shaking me just to get me to stir. When on walks with my hubby, I walk with my good ear closest to him so that I can hear all he is saying. But what does it really mean to listen?
You know when people hear you, they acknowledge you in some way but are they truly listening to what you are saying. Picture a conversation between friends. If the person that is listening to the story is just waiting for her friend to take a breath so she can say what she wants to, is she really listening to her friend? There have been times when I will be talking with my husband about his job, or something he is working on with his motorcycle and I admit I get lost in my own thoughts because I have no idea was he is talking about. I am sure the same happens when I talk with him about my job. I am hearing what is said but I am not listening to understand.
My middle child is great at stopping a conversation is she feels she is getting interrupted too many times or if she thinks we are not understanding that she really wants us to focus on what she is saying. She doesn’t like to be talked over and will step away if that happens. Whether she admits it or not she has a pretty good grasp on making sure the conversations get done the way they should be. I really do love this about her because she knows what she has to say is important to her and so she will make sure the person she is talking to understands that as well. I absolutely love some of the talks we have had.
All too often if we don’t feel like we are being heard it’s a blow to who we are. When someone takes the time to listen and understand there is value placed on the person talking. When I talk with people I would love to say I give them value all of the time, but unfortunately that doesn’t happen. Hearing loss is one thing, even when it’s partial, but to loose out in really listening we miss out on who people are. Until next time:
Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, and honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.
Leo Buscaglia
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
There was this picture I saw a couple weeks ago of a gal sitting on the floor with the huge puzzle in front of her that she had finished. It was a beautiful jungle type theme that has the different animals and plants that you would see in that environment. There was a lot of color and and lot of places in which the plants looked the same. This puzzle looked as if she had put it together on her kitchen floor just so that she could build a frame around it and keep it in that spot forever. It was a sight to see and the women had a look of joy on her face with the finished project. That is what I would call patience. It never said how long it took her to finish the puzzle or if she had help but I could imagine it took a lot of time and if she had friends and family help her finish it I bet the conversations they had over the puzzle pieces were great ones.
The thing about puzzles is you can’t really do them fast. They require that you slow down and pay attention to the details of the picture that is being created. While at my parents house my dad had a puzzle out on the kitchen table that he had started. It was about a quarter of the way done so my sister and my brother decided one night to sit down and work on it. The picture was beautiful and we were all for it until we noticed almost right away that the pieces all were cut into the same shape. Most puzzles have the pieces cut into different shapes so that it’s easier to figure out where they go. This one was a doozy. You had to figure out how to put the puzzle together based on the picture alone. Now you could cheat by looking on the underside of the pieces to see that they had numbers on them (not like a paint my number but more like numbers repeating themselves). So if you thought a piece went in a certain spot you could look on the back and see if it was a “1” in the “3” section for instance. It got frustrating real quick. We thought pieces were in the right spot just to find they belonged in another part of the puzzle all together.
I admit we ended up cheating to finish this puzzle but it was because we wanted to start a different puzzle that wasn’t as frustrating. It’s crazy to think that even if a puzzle piece is made to have the same shape as all the other pieces in the puzzle that is still has a spot. You can’t force it into a space that it doesn’t belong. With normal puzzles this is more true. If the piece doesn’t fit no amount of manipulation that will make it be right. Maybe that’s why when we were younger the puzzles we tried to do had maybe 100 pieces, they were big pieces and the pictures were simple to follow, but there wasn’t any challenge in them. As an adult those puzzles would be done in ten minutes tops.
Now picture this. In the big scheme of things our world is like a puzzle. We are all part of the puzzle, we have our own unique shape, though it can look similar to someone else’s shape. We have a certain spot we fit into and no amount of manipulation will change the fact that we won’t fit into another person’s spot. Our creator (Christ) is the one that is putting this puzzle together and knows what the finished picture looks like, but He is taking his time because He has no reason to hurry. Just like when my sister, my brother and I put together the puzzle there was some good conversations going on. We laughed, we talked and of course we ate snacks together. There were times in which my momma came and sat with us just put pieces in their intended spots, but it was more for the fellowship we had together that she really came to be with us. We took our time, I think Christ takes His time too because while He is working on the puzzle, He has fellowship with us. What an amazing idea. Christ never intended for us to rush through life, He never intended for us to try and fit in, He instead wanted us to stand out, so that when our spot was found, we would know without a doubt that it was where we were meant to be. You are part of the bigger picture. Until next time:
In every puzzle there are pieces that fit in the spots they were made for. In order to find those spots one must be willing to sit back and look at the big picture and have the patience to find that spot.
Unknown
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
We have had some storm fronts come through in the past couple of weeks that could not be ignored. These are the types of storms in which you open your front door and the door practically gets ripped from your hands. The wind is forceful enough that tree branches fall, people get pushed around and when driving you have to counteract the force of the winds as they hit your car. Now I am not talking hurricane force winds like what the south and eastern seaboards get, but they are still something to pay attention to. Our storms bring in the rain/snow and if we are “lucky” enough we will get the below freezing temperatures afterwards that make what just fell solid and slick. Once again something to pay attention to, and yet it seems as though some of us still do not.
As I was driving home from a client’s house during one of these storms, traffic started to slow down near a curve in the road near the lake. As we were slowly driving the cause of the delay became apparent when the flashing lights came into view. Now luckily these were the lights of a tow truck but the problem it faced was still magnificent. There on the side of the road in a ditch was a semi truck upside down. The trailer of the truck was full of bags of onions which had been tossed and turned as the truck was rolled over. The cab of the truck was strong enough to keep the driver safe (I read later in the paper) but the cause of the rollover looked as if the combination of the winds being strong and the speed of the truck high enough that truck itself couldn’t withstand the force. A misjudgment that could not be overlooked as the expertise of the tow truck drivers was used to get the semi-truck righted and brought into town.
High winds and strong storms should cause us to hunker down and be more cautious, but sometimes we let what we have experience in the past, and what we know of our abilities to overcome storms cloud our judgements. We hear the warnings, we look to our weather apps, but yet we still wear shorts, and complain about being cold. This coming week the church that my family and I attend will be doing a week of fasting. In the past I have gone without food for a week and grew a lot in my ability to trust that God gives strength and that He is in control. This time it will be a different type of fast that I need to do, because what I need to fast from is not food but more what I allow my eyes to feast upon. Over the last few years I have seen what social media and the internet can do, based on what I allow myself and my family to get drawn into. I admit that my ability to always monitor what my kids see is not great, and because of that, what they see as their world view has been hand fed to them by the people they love to watch. Do you see the storm brewing? My husband and I have allowed the same to happen with us and how we see the world. How did something as free as the internet bind us so well with chains?
We did not heed to the warnings. We let the fact that we have time on our hands and boredom abounding drag us to the one thing that can be mind numbing. So this coming week is a week of fasting from social media and the internet as much as can be done, based on what I need to use for work. Just as with fasting from food, there is a withdrawal period. But this is where the strength of my faith comes into play. The first thing I pray will happen is that I will be humbled. Struggling with “figuring it out myself” is huge. Dismissing help from others because “they just don’t get it” is huge. Christ was the Prince of Peace and Lord of Lords. He chose to be humbled and to become man. When we let our world views, our lifestyles and our thoughts separate us from Christ we are not going to find peace or joy. As humbling as this is God does not need us to praise Him. Think about this, even if we chose to stop praising him, nature itself will cry out.
Think about this too: How sad it would be, how sad our lives would be if we missed Jesus because of ourselves. When we don’t like what He means in our lives, or when we don’t like what we hear, we miss HIM! He chooses how He comes in our lives and sometimes it’s in the still, small whisper. Sometimes it’s in the roar of the wind. He alone knows how to get our attention, but when we make our worlds so loud with noise, we can’t hear Him, even if He is banging on our door. When we feel alone, when we feel as if the storms in our lives are too strong for us to handle, this is when we need to humble ourselves and see that we either made Christ too small or we perceive our problems to be too big for Him. Until next time:
You don’t have to be powerful, or forceful in order to get what you want. The Grand Canyon was not formed in a day. It was formed over time by a river that just flowed. Force was not used, but rather the steady stream of water with time.
We need to be steadfast in our faith, and over time the sharp edges of our hearts will turn smooth, and our faith will be our strength.
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
I finally had a chance to slow down enough to go out with a girlfriend recently. It was what my heart needed not only because she is an amazing person, but because in visiting with her she humbled me without even knowing it. We had both gotten off of work and met at a restaurant that is an original in our town and has pretty decent food but ultimately has a waitress that we love to have as “ours”. As my friend and I were visiting she saw someone else she knew at the restaurant. To see her face light up when she caught their attention was awesome. She truly cared and was interested in how they were doing including saying something about their adorable grandchildren. This is not a new thing with her, she is so very caring and speaks her mind, which brings up the part in which she humbled me.
As we were visiting I was telling her of some difficult situations I was dealing with and some of the people that were involved. She listened, and she let me vent, but what I noticed afterwards (only because it takes me a little while to process) is that she never once spoke ill or bad about anyone that she and I talked about. That is conviction without saying a word, and very humbling since I am nowhere near perfect, nor is she, but she helped in making me see that grumbling is not the answer, and trying to be more gracious is what I should be trying to do. Now if she reads this she may be thinking “I did that?!?” Yes, my friend you did without even knowing it.
I am obviously a hard headed person because I had to re-learn that same lesson the next day when while I was at work. I had to take care of a situation but I didn’t do it in the most gracious manner and there were people in the room that had listening ears. It’s so hard to say I will never have that attitude again or I won’t ever think of that person like that again, because saying never ultimately sets you up for failure. We are all sinful creatures and mess up a lot. What I tend to do is put myself above others (most of the time not seeing I am doing it until afterwards) by saying things like “oh, I wouldn’t do it that way” or ” what was that person thinking?” or even ” why wouldn’t they do it this way?” Ding, ding, ding somewhere along the way I did something differently than someone else and they said these things about me. Once again after processing what I did and said I had to allow humbleness to pour over me and I had to admit I am far from perfect.
So why is it that we want to make ourselves seem better than someone else? We bring up the negative way before we bring up the positive. A major part is because our brains are wired that way, we have to see what is out there that can harm us so we survive better. The downside is that while we are doing this we are missing out on the positive that is all around us. I love being around people that find joy in their surroundings. People that can give hugs while also letting you know you need to “temper down” are lifesavers. People who humble you and convict you without even realizing it are like diamonds that sparkle in the light. I would love to say that I won’t need to be knocked in the head again because of something I said or did, but I do hope that I have more “little things” that I do to help people than I have reasons to be convicted. While I was at work I walked passed a saying that had been framed. I never really paid attention to it until today but I will use it to end my post. Until next time:
There comes a time in all our lives when nothing seems to blend. When all the world is frowning, that’s when we need a friend.
Someone who’ll sit and listen, and perhaps add a word or two. Who with kindness hears your troubles, who we know have troubles too.
So we then owe that someone a few precious moments when we listen to their troubles, that’s the measure of a real friend.
Now the scales are balanced, and when all is said and done, our troubles seem so very small that means we both have won.
Clayton Hobart Fox
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
Today as I woke up to a new morning, it was filled with the smell of coffee and bacon. As I layed there trying to wake up and not get pounced on by the white furry ball of energy (Charlie) I realized that life is good. It’s full and it’s busy, I need to spend more time with my family, walk the dogs more and stop watching the reels on Instagram so much, but it is good. When we were celebrating Christmas last week with our extended family it hit me while we were at church for the Christmas Eve service that if I follow the two most important commandments that Christ gave: Love the Lord you God with all you heart, soul and mind and love your neighbor as yourself, the rest of what is going on fades away.
So as we were singing the songs from the hymnal I was enjoying the bobbing Christmas trees that were a part of the headband the organist was wearing. I was enjoying the fact that my family was singing along and letting the simple message wash over them. What could be simpler than the story of Christ birth and having shepherds, not scholars be the ones that get to tell the people in the town? Love your neighbor as yourself. What a simple command. What a simple way to start the new year too.
Our new year started with a cold but clear and beautiful day. I had just sent out my Happy New Year post, and was scrolling through and came upon a post that was tagged with my sister in it. It was showing a family with young kids celebrating New Years Eve with confetti poppers, a balloon clock to help count down and delicious looking food on their table. This was all wonderful to see, but the best part was the laughter of the kids in the little video, and the smiles on the adult’s faces as they looked on. I can imagine they had a fun night together. Simply loving their neighbors.
Today we will be taking down the Christmas decorations. The week will bring work, school and responsibilities. My son asked me what my New Year’s Resolutions are and normally I don’t do them but I think this year it will be to spend more time, quality time, with my family. The world will always have something going on, something for us to rejoice over or fret over. My family, and the quality time I can have with them will not always be there. The realization of this fact will hit me harder and harder this year as my oldest will start her last year of high school, and my youngest starts jr. high. I don’t want to miss any more of their lives than I already have to with life responsibilities, so I will strive for the simple. Love my family the way I would want to be loved. Put the phone down, stop making excuses and simply enjoy. Plan the trips and make them happen.
Christ, in everything He did, used love as His foundation. Simple. He didn’t overcomplicate things. Someone wanted healing, He forgave their sins. Someone wanted to follow Him, He said take up your cross. He loved the poor and the rich. He ate with sinners, and healed because of a person’s faith, or lack thereof. We are called to the simple. Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul and mind and love your neighbor as yourself. Until next time:
Making the simple complicated is commonplace; making the complicated simple, awesomely simple, that’s creativity.
Charles Mingus
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
A couple of weeks ago we had some pretty big storms come through our area. They dropped a lot of snow and then the temperatures dropped down to below freezing. It made for some days that made me want to stay inside where it was warm and cozy, but life told me I must leave my warm house and get outside. I will be the first to admit I hate being cold, but I still absolutely love how the environment changes when there is a layer of snow on top of it. So as I was driving to work I was caught in the middle of this winter wonderland in which the road looked as if it was caught in between towering trees set there to protect whatever happened to be under them. It was beautiful.
This got me thinking about what is beautiful. What makes someone stop and stare? As I drove into work I was in the middle of the winter wonderland but once I arrived the beauty that I encountered was different. One of my co-workers was able to sit with one of our hospital cats and pet her. It was simple, but it was sweet. It is a beautiful thing to be chosen by a cat. We have a cat at home Lily who basically rules my daughter’s life. The smile that is on her face when we talk about Lily or any cat in particular makes her radiate. I am talking about a teen here, getting them to do anything really is nearly impossible, but if Lily needs something, including a bath, my daughter happily obliges. This is beauty.
Beauty can be seen in the words we read. If you have ever read the story of Christ’s birth, or the book Jane Eyre, or had someone create a handmade card for you, there is so much worth, and love that comes from what we read. I once read a book about the importance of our thoughts and how the words we speak to ourselves and others can have a huge impact on how we see ourselves and people in general. If I allow harsh words and negativity to come out of my mouth all the time I turn into the ugly those words portray. On the flip side, positive and encouraging words can make the most negative around us think twice. Beauty is from within. The words that come from our mouths show what is in our hearts. This is beauty.
Beauty is definitely found in the simple. I have a pittie dog who has the most beautiful chocolate colored eyes. When she looks at you, you are never really sure if she is ready to pounce or just wants to snuggle, but if you chose correctly she gives you exactly what you need. The “Pittie smile” she has is just as beautiful as when she lays down next to me and lets me twirl her floppy ears. Beauty is the Christmas tree that is too big for the living room but it still seems to fit. A friend of mine will make her mom’s famous cinnamon roles mainly because it reminds her of her mom, this same friend has sent texts to me at random times letting me know how special she thinks I am. All of this is beautiful. Beauty is definitely in the eye of the beholder, and when it can be shared it makes it special.
Have you ever stopped long enough to think about what is beautiful? Do you create beauty in your world? What would happen if you tried these things? A new year is approaching soon. For the most of us life will not change much when it does get here, but what if instead of keeping with the “same” you tried to find the beauty around you? Until next time:
To laugh often and much; To in the respect of the intelligent people and the affection of children; To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
I was driving down the road going to another appointment. Since I was by myself I was able to have Christian and Christmas music playing loudly. While in this time of being by myself I was able to sing as loud and as off key as I wanted, which made me as happy as I could be while driving down icy roads. After a particularly fast and quirky Christmas song Amy Grant’s ” I need a Silent Night” came on the radio. The first two verses had me tuned in and quiet as she sang:
I’ve made the same mistake before Too many malls, too many stores December traffic, Christmas rush It breaks me till I push and shove
Children are crying while mothers are trying To photograph Santa and sleigh The shopping and buying and standing forever in line What can I say?
It was like she was sitting there next to me singing to me about my Christmas season. There is this inherent rush to get things done once December 1st hits. If you add in work, kids and whole bunch other things life likes to throw at you it can be so overwhelming it can make a person scream. Her chorus hits it on the mark:
I need a silent night, a holy night To hear an angel voice through the chaos and the noise I need a midnight clear, a little peace right here To end this crazy day with a silent night
This past weekend I just had to ask that my son and my husband not continue to play the games they play on their Ipads that cause them to get agitated. I had to stop my middle child and my youngest from being mean to each other because one is hungry and the other is “being annoying” I needed a silent night. Not just one in which I am cuddled into a blanket to read, but one that would draw me back to the father. I needed a silent space in which the Holy Spirit could wash over me to make it be a holy night. In the Bible when David was waiting on the Lord’s voice he expected in the loudness of thunder or the shaking of the earth, what he got instead was the quiet whisper of the wind. A friend of mine posted a quote that basically said it’s great to be in the light but by enduring the darkness you can find joy in the stars of a midnight clear.
On the night in which the angel’s light erupted into the midnight clear the shepherds were being lulled to sleep by the gentle sounds of their sheep. There was no fighting for the last toy on the shelf, but there was the uncertainty of the safety of their flock. The angels may have been rejoicing over the birth of the newborn King but they would have to hold back in the battlefield as they watch their King become a helpless human destined to die on a tree. Mary and Joseph were young and also very new to being parents, and not only parents but responsible for raising the Lord of the Universe. When Christ was born the stresses of that time were different but that didn’t mean they didn’t need what we crave today. A silent night that brings peace so that we can have a holy night that will lead us to the foot of the cross where the baby Jesus would be sacrificed for us because God loves us so much he sent Jesus to earth to save all of mankind.
“I need a Silent Night, a holy night so that instead of noise being heard I hear the whisper of love as it is wrapped around my bruised and stressed out heart. “I need a midnight clear, a little peace right here” is the battle-cry of my soul as I cling to the joy that is there but has been covered over by the worry and frustrations of the world. I can’t say that the crazy days will ever be gone, that the curiosities of my kids won’t make me still shake my head. I can’t deny there are things that make me feel as if the world has just gone off it’s axel, and it’s in these moments when the silent night and the soft cooing of the baby lying in the manger make it all bearable. Christmas is the need to know that so many years ago a baby was born in a stable and wrapped in clothe, found lying in a manger by shepherds in a nearby field. Christmas is the need to know that angels erupted in the sky to rejoice in the newborn King and that wisemen travelled miles and miles to find the baby under the star. Christmas is the need to know that because of all of this Jesus was born, and He lived and died for me because He loved me. These are the needs of the season. Until next time:
You are holding a cup of coffee when someone comes along and bumps into you or shakes your arm, causing you to spill your coffee everywhere. Why did you spill the coffee? “Because someone bumped into me!!” Nope.
You spilled the coffee because there was coffee in your cup. Had there been tea in the cup, you would have spilled tea.
Whatever is inside of the cup will spill out
So…when life shakes you (and it will), whatever is inside you will come out. The big question is…what’s in MY cup? When life gets tough, what spills over? Joy, appreciation, love, acceptance? Hostility, anger, judgement, harsh words and exhaustion? Life provides the cup, YOU choose how to fill it.
Tonight was about the worship. It wasn’t about the bank accounts having issues, or the kids needing help. It wasn’t about the work that needed to get done or the food that still needed to be made. Tonight was about bringing who I am faults and all to the cross. Christmas brings hope, wonder, and joy.
Christ was borne in a stable and placed in a manger, because there wasn’t a place available for his parents to lay their weary heads. His mom had to give birth where animals slept, ate and lived. She had to trust that Joseph would keep watch over her while she gave birth. She had to trust that the animals that were living in the stable were gentle enough that when she was in the full pains of labor they wouldn’t get antsy and try to step and move around her. When Christ was borne his parent’s were poor, and far from home and all things normal and comfortable to them. There wasn’t a doctor nearby and hospitals were not a thing. When Christ was borne Mary and Joseph had each other but more importantly they had God who was watching over them and helping them every step of the way.
The shepherds only had themselves to offer as worship, after being woken by the great multitudes of angels, they left their flock (their livelihood) to follow some distant star in search of a child. A child that most likely looked like other children borne in that same town and night. The shepherds had to trust in God that they would find baby Jesus and that while they were gone in the search of him, that their sheep would be cared for. God calls us like he called the shepherds to give all we have and to trust that in every situation He is in control and will provide and watch out for us. This even means watching over stinky sheep.
While I sat in church tonight with my hubby and my youngest child, the worries and frustrations that I have had on my heart were fighting hard to keep hold of my attention. Our pastor wanted to read to us from the Psalms before we started the singing. He read from Psalms 117 which reads: Praise the Lord, all you nations; extol him, all you peoples. For great is his love for us, and the faithfulness of the Lord endures forever. Praise the Lord. In so many situations complaining and worrying are the first things we want to do. We are programed to see the negative before the positive, and even seem to remember the bad times over the good times. What we have forgotten and have overlooked is that we were made to worship. We are always in search of something to worship whether it is ourselves or the next fad. We want people to know what it is we find important. Psalms 117 tells us we need to Praise the Lord, that’s it. He is who we need to worship.
When I have been overwhelmed this week the last thing I wanted to do was worship. I wanted to complain, eat chocolate and cry. I forced myself to open my devotional. As sad as that sounds it was a forced situation. As I would read, and then look up the Bible verse associated with the devotion, the stress didn’t magically melt away, the worries and frustrations were still there but they were put in their place: At the foot of the cross. When I was reading the Bible my life didn’t get easier but I did have peace. I worshiped Christ by giving of my time though reluctantly at first. When our church announced that there would be a worship night I knew I needed to go, even if it was just me. I needed to be put in my place as well.
Most of the songs I knew and the ones I didn’t know I let wash over me as I just sat and listened. I was able to worship with my time and my voice. The pastor ended the service with a prayer and as we sat and shared time with others eating the cookies provided it was awesome to look around the room and see the various people present. There were some I knew better than others but they all came with worries and frustrations on their hearts and they all decided that for tonight they would be there for the worship. Until next time:
Remind yourself that the majority of what’s stressing you out today won’t matter a month from now. Shake it off, reset, and bring your attention back to what’s important. Bring it back to worship.
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Rae’s New Shine Children’s Book, great Christmas gift!
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
Right now in my home, it doesn’t look like there is a major holiday coming up. The snow is on the ground thanks to the “storm of the season”, the temperatures have dropped to below freezing, and from what I can tell from driving around town Christmas is around the corner. Christmas is the only season in which we really decorate, once the tree hunt is done and the tree is placed in it’s spot it becomes real. There is a certain energy that comes with the Christmas season. It’s a part holiday shopping stress, a part excitement for baking, and most importantly it’s an awe of what the season is all about.
I want to say that I am not stressed about the holiday shopping part, but I am. I promise myself every January that I will shop all year long for the following Christmas season and then I realized 3 weeks before Christmas that I did not keep my promise. I am lucky now that my kids are older and I don’t feel the like I have to keep the gift giving magic alive as much as I used to when they were younger. The difference now is they are more specific in the what they are interested in and so they usually have an idea of what they will get, and they are more grateful for what they have received. I love to see their faces light up on Christmas morning because of the gift that was given. But Christmas is more than that
For the past 20 years we have gone out and gotten a tree from the woods. We used to get trees that ended up being too big for the space they were being put into, but we have learned over the years that even if it looks small it’s probably still to big for our house. So we target those trees that would be considered “suppressed”. They are usually the ones that are under the canopy of the larger more dominant trees, hoping to get just a little of sunshine. They are the underdogs of the tree world. So we find the “perfect” one an we take it home to decorate it while listening to Christmas music. The ornaments are random coming from my hubby’s childhood through our kids childhood and beyond. There is no rhyme or reason but that is what I love about it. The lights are the multicolored lights and the angel on top adds the finishing touch. This is also the point in which my hubby decides all of the Christmas inflatables he has accumulated over the years get blown up and placed in the front yard. But Christmas is more than these traditions too.
Christmas energy comes from knowing the reason for the season. All the other stuff is fluff. I love to hide behind the “I’m too busy” excuse, Christmas helps me to see that there are more important things in life than being busy. A sermon I recently listen too, the pastor talked about worship and he brought up three different people that came to worship when Christ was born. The first person/people were the wise men. They worshipped using their intelligence, time and money. They travelled from a place far away, knowing where they needed to go based on the placement of the stars and the studying they did. They had the time and money to travel (they were on camels and on foot and had a large amount of people with them). It would take them months to get to Bethlehem, and the gifts they gave were very expensive. The types of gifts they gave (gold, frankincense, and myrrh) were gifts meant for a king but also one that would be used in a burial. The gifts were thought through and intentional.
The second person/people were the shepherds. They stunk, they were outcasts, and not very many people wanted them around and yet the angels put on such a performance for them to see. They brought what they had, which wasn’t much other than themselves. For Christ, even as a baby that was enough. I think this is where most of us fall into for a category of people, not that we stink or live with sheep, but we feel we don’t have much to offer so why would Christ want us? This is where He says “come to be all who are weary and I will give you rest”
The third person, really didn’t have a choice on being there since she gave birth to Christ, but Mary gave her body, mind and soul as an act of worship. She would not know the amount of suffering she would endure because of her baby boy, but even if she did she would still worship. She trusted God with her life. When Christ was born she didn’t know the world had changed in that instance. It says in the Bible that she pondered these things in her heart, when the wise men visited and the shepherds came. Her whole life was an act of worship, and because she believed we have the hope of Christmas in our hearts to ponder. This is what Christmas is about. This pondering and worshipping with what we have is what makes Christmas come alive. Where is your heart this Christmas? What have you made important? Until next time:
Remind yourself that the majority of what’s stressing you out today won’t matter a month from now. Shake it off, reset, and bring your attention back to what’s important.
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Rae’s New Shine Children’s Book, great Christmas gift!
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
When the kids were younger it was easier to get them to go placed with you. There really was no choice on their end, and for the most part they didn’t seem to mind going, unless of course it was to the doctor or dentist. The kids would trust that you would take care of them, and if you are fun parents usually the destination was worth going to. For the majority of us, we try to make sure there are fun places sprinkled into life, and so there is a level of anticipation if the plans aren’t laid out beforehand.
When our kids were little we learned early on not to tell them what the plans were because it usually meant there would be a thousand questions and not enough time to get ready. We loved to surprise our kids with fun events that ranged from going out to eat at a fast food place to flying to the grandparents house to spend Christmas with them. We would take pictures and record videos of their reactions so that we could relive them throughout the years. Our party of five had fun together, we would try new things and know that there would be a new adventure around the corner. One event that became a tradition was going out into the woods to pick a tree, cut it down and bring it home to decorate for Christmas. Usually one kid would have the dogs, one would fall behind and the other would carry the axe that dad would use to get the tree. Most often getting the tree was the quick part, we would hang out afterwards to play in the snow and eat lunch before heading home. The kids would then help get the tree decorated once we got it home while I would get the most upbeat Christmas music I could find going.
Now that they are closer to young adult/teenage years we still do this tradition but now we have to battle against jobs, online events and stubbornness. Now we have to negotiate and plan around what they have going on. What makes this tradition better now is that they want to go vs. us just hoping in the car and we go. As we planned this years outing, I know it will be different, but my hope is that they will see there is still magic in doing things as a family. I hope they will still want to get involved in picking the try and not just standing there waiting to go back to the car. I hope they will laugh and joke with each other while we are in the car and while we hike to the perfect spot. My party of five will soon be a party of 4 when my oldest finishes high school and moves out. My party of five already feels like a party of two as my hubby and I find ourselves together while the kids are out doing their own thing.
I know that just as seasons change from spring to summer to fall to winter, seasons change in life. I know the sparkle and joy of Christmas is still there but it is different with older kids in our home. No one believes in Santa anymore, but everyone still loves to hear the Christmas story on Christmas morning and bake goodies until our belts pop. We appreciate our time together more and try to have as much fun as we can. I am not ready for my kids to be their own people, but at the same time I love that they are. Until next time:
You don’t need to rearrange the stars or move mountains to be enough. You don’t need to have you entire life in order, or be perfect in any way. You just need to be able to offer love, and be willing to receive it in return. Because that’s all anyone ever needed anyways.
Dane Thomas
Rae’s New Shine Children’s Book, great Christmas gift!
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
This week we had a trip, it was to celebrate our anniversary. The whole plan was to leave the kids and the pets behind with my sister who took the challenge like a champ. We had it all planned out, and then our dog Jorj put a little kink in the wheels. He had been acting a little weird a couple of days before we were to leave so I decided to get some bloodwork done on him since the pain meds that I thought he needed were not really cutting it. When I got the results I wanted to get swallowed up into the biggest hole I could be put in. He was anemic and not just anemic but he had the kind in which his body was attacking itself. We had to act quick and get him started on steroids and the ever so yummy liver. I wanted to cancel my trip, I wanted to just stare at him and hope that by me staring at him he would all of a sudden be better. Jorj is my “old man”, he has always had a medical issue to contend with. This was just another hit to system, but for some reason, I still had worry racking at me, but I also had this weird peace that even if I decided to still do my trip with my hubby that all would be alright.
We decided with a little help from my sister’s kick out the door that we would go on our trip. Each day I would get an update, sometimes more than once that Jorj was improving. I got pictures of him counter surfing, to the update today that he raced out to the back fence with our other dog Charlie. I have had to do hard things in the past, but leaving Jorj was a different kind of hard. I was asking my sister to do what she could to keep my dog alive and my Vet was doing what she could to help the situation. Because of this, my trip still happened, to which I am so thankful.
My hubby and I celebrated our anniversary this week. We have always been there for each other, and so of course we were again when this hit. We needed to get away though. We needed a break from life, so that we could connect again with each other, and just have fun. We took the time we had and had great food, long walks and a trip along a zipline through canyons with views of the ocean. We talked and walked, and walked some more. The place we went hadn’t changed really all that much from when we were there 9 years ago or when we were there 20 years ago, but it got us dreaming again. How fun would it be to take our family there? We have kids that will be out of the house sooner than later. We have kids that are still willing to hang out with their parents, and we have extended family that has fun when we get together. Plans started forming (at least in our minds). Why not go somewhere new together?
As I sit here in a state of thanksgiving (the turkey cooking helps a lot), I am so thankful that my Jorj dog is doing better and that my sister helped in making it possible for us to go on our trip. I am thankful for my veterinarian who was there when I needed her (she is amazing that way). I am thankful for my family, and for the people I don’t even know that made the adventures I had in the last few days amazing. I am thankful that my hubby loves me and I love him. I am thankful I don’t actually have to cook a Thanksgiving dinner but I get to enjoy the dinner that is being made. I am thankful for turkey to have vs. a package of pre-cooked turkey (sorry sis) that my kids and their aunt get to have because of kids who are very picky. I am thankful, not because life is easy, but because even when life gets hard good can still happen. I leave with my parent’s dog nudging my elbow, and a good book ready to be read. Happy Thanksgiving! Until next time:
You can’t calm the storm. What you can do is calm yourself, and the storm will eventually pass. The most powerful and practical changes happen when you decide to take control of what you do have power over, instead of craving control over what you don’t.
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
I remember one time when I was younger, I had lost something that was my dads. He hadn’t gotten home from work yet, but my mom knew that he would want what I had lost once he was home. She did what every mom would do she asked me where it was. I responded like most kids would and said “I don’t know, I didn’t have it” and so she asked my siblings the same question and found that I was in fact the last one in possession of this object. So she asked again. This time I came clean and said “I don’t remember”. Instead of my mom going into a rant about how I should be more responsible, she simply put my nose in a corner and said I could leave said corner when I could remember where I placed the lost object. Needless to say, it took a bit longer for my memory to come up with the answer, so my mom went into “mom mode”. Did you know this mode is magic? The house may have been torn apart but the lost was found way before my dad came home to notice the object was missing.
Today as I was talking to momma Mary I brought up the fact that all of the pens in the clinic have disappeared. I also brought up that the sharpies, packing tape and even the thermometers have gone missing ever since we started moving things around. I threatened to start having our co-workers empty their pockets before leaving but she looked at me like I was crazy. As I was ranting about the missing items I was reminded that when we started to re-organize the person that was doing a lot of the moving around was no longer with the clinic and so finding said items may not happen. That was pretty much motivation she needed to go into “mom mode”. By the time I had gotten back from my appointment she had found pens and two packages of sharpies. She didn’t have time to look for the thermometers and packing tape but I have no doubt by tomorrow afternoon all will be found.
Christ talks about finding as well. In Luke alone He brought up how a shepherd noticed one of his 100 sheep was missing, so he left his 99 sheep to go out and find the lost one. Christ then brings up a woman who had 10 coins, not 100 or a 1000 but 10 and she lost one. She searched high and low (mom mode was in full swing I am sure) until she found that tenth coin. His last story in Luke 15 was about a lost son. The man’s youngest son wanted his portion of his inheritance, he wanted to get out of his dad’s house and go live on his own. He did this for a while but was very irresponsible with his money and how he lived. So much so that he ran out of money, couldn’t get a job and ended up eating and living with pigs, literally. This is when he came to his senses, he knew that if he just went home at least his dad would give him a job and he could eat with the servants. When he was still a ways off his dad (who had been looking and waiting for him) saw him and instead of scoffing and being angry at his son, he ran to him. His son was lost but was now found.
Sometimes I picture Christ going into “mom mode”. We are all lost. It is noticeable with some people, while others no one would ever know they were lost. Christ knows our hearts. He knows when we are straying and going down a different path. He will search for us, but we also have to want to be found. Unlike moms in search of the elusive toy or tool that their child or husband has lost, Christ will search for us and seek us but we have to make the choice to be found. I love that we are given the choice but being a momma of teenagers it scares me have to death knowing they may choose to go away from Christ. I can lead them to where they were lost but I can’t find their faith for them. This is where my faith in Christ’s “mom mode” must be strong enough to know His love for them is more powerful than my fear of loosing them to this world. Until next time:
Strong? No, my friend, I am far from it. What you’re seeing is simply a weak person with a very strong God.
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
There has been an on going theme over the last couple of months that has everything to do with community. As my pastor just preached at the midweek service we can’t be a me without the we. We are meant to be in community with others. This spoke volumes when I decided that it was easier to figure things out on my own. I had gotten to a point in which I felt I could do things not necessarily better, in a way I felt they should get done if I just did them myself. This is a very selfish way of looking at life, but I was there. I was tired of trusting other people, I was tired of feeling like I would have to explain myself, and I was tired of not being heard. So I gathered myself up into my own little world and chose to reach out only when it was the last thing I could do.
Instead of doing better, I got more cynical, and tired of how life was going. It was a lonely place to be. I could be surrounded by people but feel like the only one in the room. 1 Corinthians 12:12-26 talks about us all being one body, and with that we each have specific jobs we do. Just as an eye doesn’t say “because I am not an ear, I don’t belong to the body” we all were made for a reason. We were and are made to be in community with each other. This goes for our home life, our work life and even our spiritual life. We were not made to do this life alone. It’s when we try and do it alone that we fail and faulter in what we do.
A very wise friend of mine convicted me the other day. She had noticed that I was going down the path of “my way or the highway” and she loved me enough to bring it to my attention. She didn’t do it to make me feel guilty but more for me to step back and re-evaluate my path. Because she took the time, and care enough I realized that I was not a very nice person to be around. My co-workers were feeling it, my family had to hear me complain and vent more than I had before, and I was not feeling the joy that usually brought me peace and contentment. I admit there was and is still some guilt from how my attitude played out on the people around me, but the only thing I can do for that is to ask for forgiveness and work to stay away from that path in the future. What brought me there in the first place was pride. I was going to do life my way, and I proceeded to shut my community out.
Community can be one person, or many. It’s a place to be held accountable, but also a place to feel safe. It’s a place to lift each other up and support each other. Not one of us is better than someone else. When we realize this and move to support each other rather than tear down, even in difficulties we can work like a well oiled machine. As I write this I know there are people I need to reach out to. If I am to use the faith I have I know that I need to act and not just speak love and joy. It’s an amazing thing, when people put aside their differences and come together.
As I think about the last few days, it’s crazy to think that had I just reached out instead of saying I was too busy, I would have known that a friend was contemplating a new life choice, that another friend had a scary health issue come up again, that a family member just wasn’t feeling her best because of stress. More often than not we are bombarded with self care posts, and ads and articles. There is a time and place for self care, don’t get me wrong, but usually you will find that strength comes in knowing your community is there for you and you are there for them. With strength comes joy, and so as I write this I have been invited to a game night with some gals from church and my girls want to come with me. I have texted a friend to invite her out to dinner. I have a prayer list for those near and dear that have concerns laying on their hearts. This is community, this is self care, just as much as doing the solitary activity can bring joy so can being active in the lives around you. Until next time:
Surround yourself with relentless humans. People who plan in decades, but live in moments. Train like savages, but create like artists. Obsess in work, relax in life. People who know this is finite, and choose to play infinite games. Find people going up mountains. Climb together
Zach Pogrob
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
Today my daughter and I get to teach Sunday School. We are put into a room with 4-5yr old kids who have no cares in the world. They are just happy to come in and play, learn about Jesus and eat snacks. It is so fun to watch them interact with each other. Most of them know each other from church, but there are a few new kiddos that come and are welcomed into the play circles enthusiastically. Lego forts are build, pretend meals are made and play animals are cared for. There are are few kids that have a hard time being away from their parents but usually forget about their worries when our song leader comes in to sing his songs.
Today we get to learn about “The Good Samaritan” if you haven’t read this story it’s found in Luke 10:25-37. The basis of the story is to love your neighbor as yourself. What a concept to teach such young kids. We were not born to love others first, but rather to love ourselves and then once we are good, then we can look to what others need. So as I prepped, I found an object lesson that was perfect since it involved candy. Now if you read through the paragraph above you can see that the kids in my classroom have a pretty good grasp on loving their neighbors, but it’s still a lesson worthy of teaching. The kids all sat in a circle on the carpet. Each one of them got to have one piece of candy. This is torture of course for a kid but they did well. Then they got to tell me how yummy that candy tasted. The next step was to give them a piece of ice. They had to keep it in their mouths for as long as they could stand it, once they spit it out they were immediately given another piece of candy. They then told me how that piece of candy tasted. Obviously they wouldn’t have been able to taste that piece because their tongues were numb from the ice. This is how it is when we don’t love our neighbors as ourselves.
As stated, before the kids got the ice they were given a piece of candy. All of them told me how yummy it was and actually asked for more, but a lesson needed to be taught about loving others, so I explained that just like the candy tasting good, that’s how we feel when we help others. We feel good, we have a better outlook on life. We want to do it more because the joy we see in the eyes of those we helped is the joy that Jesus wants us to feel and share. The candy that was given to the kids after the ice didn’t taste like anything. This is what it’s like when we are selfish and only think of ourselves. Our lives are numb, and joy is hard to find. Sometimes it takes work to love and help others, but even with the sacrifice, it’s better than to not sacrifice at all.
The kids grasped this concept better than I had thought they would, probably because in it’s simplest form it is easy. As we get older and the world teaches us that it’s not as easy to trust as it should be, we get cynical in our outlooks. We even start to think mean thoughts about ourselves. Here’s some things to try: volunteer to help at a shelter, buy some extra food at the store and find someone who needs some. Talk with a pastor about where there is a need and fill the need. Bake cookies for your neighbor. In our world looking past ourselves, is what gets us in a place of compassion and joy. My daughter and I volunteered to teach, not because we love getting up early on a Sunday, but because we love to see the kids, and we get to act like kids as well. There is joy in that. Jesus said “let the little children come to me”. When we have childlike faith it is easier to run to Him and see what He has to offer us. What we take from His love, is what we should share with others, it’s as simple as that. Until next time:
Being negative only makes a journey more difficult. You may be given a cactus, but you don’t have to sit on it.
Joyce Meyer
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
Today, seventeen years ago my daughter made me a momma. It is so hard to believe that I have someone that old that is my child, but I would not want to wake up from this dream if I had to. Now don’t get me wrong she is a typical teenager in which she is the perfect button pusher but at the same time her heart is made of gold. So today we celebrate her with cake, presents and kicking her out of the house to shop all day (we tried to do the party thing but she declined). So due to the fact that she is out of the house, and the other two kids decided to have outside engagements it has left me to my lonesome to ponder life’s wonders.
First on my list, have you ever wondered what it would be like to be a cat? Ok, so I was talking to my brother with a video chat when I realized I had never actually been shown his house. So while he was giving me the “tour” his two cats showed up. One of them quickly disappeared (probably had too much attention placed on it with the video), while the other one decided to settle in on the couch. They had been outside probably plotting someone’s demise when they saw that the back door had been opened. Luckily my brother was ready and able to feed them as soon as they put their pretty little feet on the kitchen floor. We started talking about them of course which made me start thinking about what it would be to be a cat. Basically you get loved on, on your terms, if someone doesn’t feed you right away you can go lay on their heads or go hunt for yourself. You rule everything! My middle child won’t even get up to go to the bathroom if her cat is laying on her, she will hold it until her eyeballs turn yellow. This then made me think about the fact that teenagers are just cats. The description fits them perfectly.
The other thing that got my brain to start wandering is how on earth does a single action have so much power over the outcome of a moment? I had just gotten back from a trip that had been longer than I first expected. When I got back to work, my dear friend came up to me and gave me a hug. With that single gesture my outlook for the rest of the day was brighter. I have talked about this friend before and how she is the perfecter of hugs. Like she should teach a class on them she is so good. A hug from her can make the worries for the moment just fade away. On top of being a world class hugger, she is a prayer warrior. She will come at a situation and think through it with prayer on her mind. It’s amazing!
Lastly on this special day, I thought about all the ways in which I have been blessed to be a momma. I have three wonderful kids. They are all button pushers but have big hearts. We have fun together, learn together, roll our eyes and my husbands bad dad jokes together, and even work together. I wish I could give them more hugs but my two oldest have informed me they have grown out of that stage, so my youngest is stuck taking the brunt of the hug monster. The more I am around them, the more I realize they have more cat-like characteristics than I ever thought possible. I have learned that patience really is a virtue, that being tough is sometimes really hard, and that picking my battles is so very important. I am a better person because of my kids, and I have also learned what it is that I will stand for. I pray hard for them, and force myself to stand back and let them learn. So as my oldest spends her birthday money on so many, many books and other nick knacks, I will be here thinking of how I will make her cake, and how I can manage to get more hugs in. Until next time:
She is beautiful, but not like those girls in the magazines.
She is beautiful for the way she thinks.
She is beautiful for the sparkle in her eyes when she talks about something she loves. She is beautiful for her ability to make other people smile. Even when she is sad.
No, she isn’t beautiful for something as temporary as her looks. She is beautiful deep down in her soul.
F. Scott Fitzgerald
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
How are you doing today? “Good, how are you?” Hey, is there something I can help you with, so you can get out of here quicker? “No, but thank you”. She seems to always be so happy and cheerful. He is always so helpful. It’s fine, everything is fine.
There are so many statements that can be said that we use to hide what we are truly going through. Sometimes it feels easier to to do this, so that explanations don’t have to be said, but what it really does is alienate us from friends and family that could be a supportive cornerstone in our lives.
To say that we need help, calls us to step out from behind the shields that we have put up. It calls us to be humble. When we have tunnel vision on our problems we put them on a platform that makes them bigger than life. This is what happened recently with me. I made the problems that I was facing become bigger than the support I could have gotten.
Recently as I was going through a hard time and I had decided that I would keep it to myself. In my wisdom I thought I was doing the right thing since I didn’t want to put the hardships on anyone else. I felt I could be my own savior and that I could endure the issues on my own. I was in the state of mind that no one else could or would want to help me get through what I had going, but what I realized quickly (but not quickly enough) was that I needed to be humble and reach out.
We were created to be live in a community. We were made to support each other. Christ calls us to serve, to be humble, to help carry each other’s load. We are called to be bold in helping others and not hide behind the issues and problems that we are having. When we reach out and serve it can help us get out from behind the masks we put on.
When my oldest daughter was in jr. high she did a talk to her youth group about using disguises to seem normal, to help get through life. What most people in her youth group didn’t know was that at that time she was really struggling with anxieties and self worth. She hid her problems well. What she concluded her lesson with was that when we do this we are deceivers. The problem with being a deceiver is that you will be deceived later, by someone else who may hiding things well. There is no need to “fake it till you make it”. When we can be real with each other we are being who God made us to be. When we choose to not allow our issues to own us our attitudes will change. We can see our identities change. We can look at the world in a different light and see ourselves in that same light.
As a whole we will always have problems and issues that we face. When we ask for help, or let people in on our lives, we are allowing ourselves to be open. The friends and family won’t necessarily fix our situations but they can help us carry the load. This is one of the many times in which being humble is a strength and gives us power to be who we are. So let’s get out of the tunnel vision we are in, open our eyes to the circles we are a part of and share our joys and our weaknesses with those that want to support and help us. Until next time:
Being humble means recognizing that we are not on earth to see how important we can become, but to see how much of a difference we can make in the lives of others.
G.Hinckley
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
I sit here and I wait. I am waiting for the sun to rise, and I wait for the caffeine to kick in. I know that I will go back to reality soon, the job, my family, my dogs and my cat. I came to where I am so that I could wait. In the process of this waiting I have found that even in waiting we all do it so differently.
My parent’s house is not on the large size, but the sounds that come with it are. The sounds range from a door closing to family members talking in the kitchen. If you thought you would sleep in, that will not happen in this house. Dogs happen in this house too. I think they are some of my favorite ways to pass the time when waiting. They have no idea why their house went from calm and quiet to having three extra people as well as a puppy descend on them, and they do not care (except for when poor Thor has to contend with the puppy, by playing just as hard). Dogs make it so easy to forget for a moment that things are going on around you. I dare you to not smile when they are all playing and running and fighting over a stuffed monkey.
In the mist of waiting, processing happens. We went out to dinner one night with family, and while the food was great the company was better. It was hilarious, and eye opening. The overall theme was that we need to have fun together, we need to be there for each other and most importantly we need to see the importance of not holding onto what has happened in the past, but own it and move forward from it. Waiting, especially when away from home makes you realize how much you miss home. I love my bed, that is what I miss. I miss my kids, my hubby , my dogs and of course the cat. I know that life is going on without me right now and that really makes me humble, knowing that in the big scheme of things, life will go on. Maybe this trip will help me to see that my “britches could have gotten too big for me”. Sometimes that is needed too.
As I sit and write and ponder, I am listening again to my family figure out the current “problem” that needs to be fixed. I know who will be the fixer, who will be the worrier, who will be the one who is receiving the solution, and who will be the ones that will help move the process along. It’s really a relief and a joy that we come together and things happen. All along my parent’s dog Thor lays on the floor silently judging me for not sitting on the floor playing with him. Oddly enough there is joy in that too. So what does all this pondering, and processing bring me to?
I miss my family, that is true, but I also got to be with my extended family as we celebrate a life that was truly joyful. If I could think of an example of joy to emulate it would be what my family has. We pull together when we need to, we fight for each other and we are loyal. We accept the differences we have and support the quirks in between. We navigate the trials of life as well as the playfulness of the dogs. We willingly stuff ourselves into a home meant for two so that we can enjoy the company of many. Waiting is what brought us together. We didn’t have to wait long, God wanted His angel sooner than we wanted to give her up, but in her departure she brought us all together. I will work on expanding my joy more, with the help of a legacy of joy to look up to. Life is short, and it has a tendency to not be easy, but joy and a baseline of humbleness can help in navigating through it. Until next time:
When you see me in your dreams, I’m really there. When you see me in the distance, that’s me. When you sense and feel me around the house, I’m there. I have not left you, I will always be by your side and in your heart.
Unknown
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
$12.00
To be a part of a family means there are times when love causes you be a part of situations that can reek havoc on your emotions. Life teaches us that we will go through ups and downs, joys and sorrows. It was through a time of sorrow that joy abounded. The family was called together for a time when an angel was waiting to be called home. In this time we came in full force or as my brother said we “swarmed in like a hoard of locus” in which I corrected him and changed it to a “plethora of beautiful butterflies” in which there was a slight eye roll. The call came and we answered. In this we allowed our hearts to come back “home”. So how is the joy found in the sorrow of the moment? As we visited around the table we talked about how to support each other, and came up with laughter organically.
Laughter really touches the soul and brings forth joy. I really didn’t know how much I needed family time until I came home to my parents house. I also didn’t know that a church service to awaken my soul again. Did I mention the dogs? Ok I know that I have said over and over again that I work with animals. I have gone a week plus without having a dog or a cat close by, and boy did it take it’s toll. I came into my parent’s house and was immediately confronted with the biggest, happiest, dogs. A little while later after I had forced these two dogs to get snuggled my sister came along with her puppy. The introductions were a little off in the sense that poor little Clem had two very big dogs rush her without warning, but it was all in curiosity and slobber, which she has since recovered and is showing them whose boss. Joy came in the form of memories shared in the living room. It also came from making plans, working on a ridiculously hard puzzle and enjoying a peach crunch with ice cream.
Joy also comes in knowing that you are supported by your immediate family and work family. Being away from the people you see on a daily basis is a hard thing to do, but as the pastor taught on Sunday it’s about finding ways to worship through life. We are together because of a hard situation, we are worshipping the creator because we know through good and bad He is in control. Joy isn’t always about being happy. It’s about knowing who is in control and allowing that to wash over you. I would love to have hard times never come into my life, but they are put there so that I can grow and learn and maybe use the experience to help someone else. I love that through the joy that my family member had and pushed into our lives we get to celebrate her for who she is. My joy comes from my faith, even when it’s tested. It comes from family, extended, immediate and work all included. My joy comes from a kind and compassionate pastor who sees me as important and hugs me like I will always be a part of his family. My joy comes from crying, from daydreaming and from enjoying the people and pets around me.
Life will go back to “normal” next week. We will all head back to our designated parts of the states. We will resume our lives, but we will do so with the knowledge that once again we grew. Our hearts grew a bit bigger, and hopefully the walls that we keep though big or small didn’t grow at all. We will go back to the troubles we left for a short time, but hopefully we will have a better perspective on them. We will even have new places that the dog hair found itself in, but this is all a part of life giving joy. Until next time:
To laugh often and much; To win the respect of intelligent people an the affection of children; To ear the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
One thing I learned right off the bat is the more you think you know about a certain topic, you really don’t know that much. What I also learned is that if you are willing to admit this and are open to acquire more knowledge people are willing to offer up that knowledge to you. It takes a great big leap of humbleness to get to that place of admitting your “downfall” but it can be full of enlightenment. I went to a conference recently in which I shared a house with seven women. We are all at different walks of life, and we have opinions that sometimes match, and sometimes not, and due to this fact the conversations can get interesting. This is also the time, if you are good at this, in which staying quiet and just listening to what is said around you can help you to see the what it is that make people tick.
This also brings up to topic of people watching. It is so interesting to watch people as they walk by. What are they thinking? Where are they going? What causes them to have the expression they have on their face? Are they good people? When you are at this type of conference you hope that the people that are here with you are also good people only for the fact that they have jobs that require them to advocate for the pets that they care for. While I was sitting waiting for my next class to start, I had the privilege to sit with a friend who I hadn’t had the chance to talk to for a long time. In so many ways she was the same sweet person, the change that I noticed the most was the confidence she had in herself. When I first met her she was just starting out in the vet medical world and didn’t know much, just like me. Now we both have had kids, have been in the field for years, have had some of the same experiences with much different outcomes, and we have matured and grown through the life stages.
Time and experiences will really make you see what kind of person you are. I once said to someone that I feel as though I really am not a nice person because I tend to get frustrated a lot when things are done the right way. After I said that I realized that I was letting the small things get to me. That I wasn’t allowing people to be people, that I wasn’t taking into consideration that they may just be having a bad day. Then I realized further that I get frustrated at myself a lot too because I don’t give myself slack. People walk through life either trying to survive it, or thrive through it. As I learned more about the women I share the house with, and the friend I finally got to visit with, I realized that there was surviving with a bunch of thriving thrown on top. People will project to the world what they want the world to see, thus the interest in people watching, but when you get down to the heart of it’s about the why of life, and putting the importance on that. Until next time:
Caterpillars have to dissolve into a disgusting pile of goo to become butterflies.
So if you’re a mess wrapped up in blankets right now, keep going
unknown
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
This couldn’t be happening, I had already seen how destructive this way of thinking was to the people around me. I was starting to see it seep into my own life, and knew if I wasn’t careful, the thoughts would overtake me like it had in the past. It was so easy to let it happen, especially when the effects didn’t seem too bad. But deep down I knew that little by little cracks would happen in the foundation I had worked so hard to reinforce.
Another Saturday in the books, scrolling and watching reels and looking at what people posted instead of being productive and present with the family. It is so easy to pick up the phone and hit the app that will make you forget that you have things to do. The goal was to start unplugging more and finding ways in which creativity will blossom, and so with a new day the goal is set again. Negative thoughts help make way for excuses to be made when positive ideas can be accomplished. So the choice needs to be made to squash the negative and work towards the positive.
Enter the UNO card game. Teenagers can be a fickle group, one minute they are in their rooms for hours on in, in a zombie-like trance, the next minute they get into the game closet and pull out the UNO cards to play with whoever is available. Today it was my two teenage daughters. My middle child is usually the zombie in the room while my eldest is the zombie on the couch. With each card that is played trash talk is said and laughter ensues. It’s music to my ears, loud music but music non the less. They are being present and having fun. There are no negative thoughts happening. Every so often they look back at where I have camped out to see if there is a reaction to a comment made. What they don’t see is that my heart is swelling with joy at the fact that they are having fun.
Have you ever noticed that when an adult let’s go of the adult life for a little bit and acts and plays like a child they tend to have so much fun? Being an adult is hard, so when the chance arises to be childlike it is liberating. Problems can be forgotten, and critical thoughts vanquished. The last few Sundays my eldest daughter and I got to teach Sunday school. This weeks lesson was about how Jesus calmed the storm. So of course we found a blue blanket and had the kids hold onto the edges of it and when they were told to flop it up and down like a storm they had so much fun doing it. When “Be Still!” was yelled out they had to stop flopping. We then let one kid at a time sit under the blanket so that they could yell “Be Still!” whenever they wanted. The craft was then to make waves out of streamers so that they could run around waving the streamers and would have to freeze when “Be Still!” was yelled. I didn’t once think about work, outside life, or troubles. I was able to act like a kid for an hour plus. It’s no wonder that Jesus said “let the little children come to me” in the simplest form kids have the greatest of faiths and don’t have a care in the world. They trust wholeheartedly and love easily. This is how the foundation of my life is reinforced, to try and love and have joy like a child. When critical thoughts, cynical acts and negative emotions come streaming in, I have to remember in this storm Christ is saying “Be Still”, if I can pay attention to his words then all will be quiet and joy flows. Until next time:
Please don’t ever get tired of being a good person with a good heart. I know it sucks being taken advantage of and feeling like it’s better to be cold hearted sometimes. But people like you are what give this world hope.
Dhar Mann
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Help keep Living Joyfully a place where hope abounds and people can find ways to see the joy around them
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
One foot in front of the other, really that’s all it would take. But there was more to it, there would be getting into the car, and actually turning it on so that she could get to the destination she was aiming for. Why was this so difficult she thought? It is literally talking to someone and asking them a favor. It wasn’t like she was asking them for their first born child. But still she sat. She had made it to her car, but then sat there convincing herself that she could drive where she needed to go. Then she had an idea, since she wasn’t going any where at the moment why not look up the websites for the businesses she had to visit. Maybe if she knew more about the owners and what the businesses actually sold it would make this process easier. It didn’t take long for her to realize that she was stalling, so she started the engine and drove to the park that she planned to park at. Both stores were within walking distance of each other so that would give her a chance to walk and pray. The butterflies in her stomach were fluttering wildly, but she knew that if she wanted to move forward the next few steps had to happen.
Shortly after she had finally finished her tasks, she realized that life had gone on. She had the relief in knowing she had accomplished what she set out to do. She also realized she had to be ok if the people she talked to were not interested. Still, she called her husband and let him know how everything went. She didn’t realize it at the time but when he said how proud he was of her, she melted. She needed to hear those words. Needed to know that she had someone rooting for her. With those simple words the rest of her day felt lighter.
Challenges are put in front of us all of the time. Most of us will take them head on and celebrate when they are done. What is missed though? When we get in this frame of mind good can be missed. What if what you created is being enjoyed but you miss out because you are so focused on the fact that you needed to get “it out there” for people to enjoy it. What if what you created brought you joy, but while sharing it with others you forgot that it brought you joy in the first place. My sister when she was going to college to get her Graphics Design degree she had taken a picture I had of my oldest daughter and had used it as part of a project. She had basically taken the way the picture looked from the camera and had made it better through her “filters” and creativity. I still love to look at the picture she created. I am sure during the time she was in the class, she didn’t see it as something someone else would enjoy later on, since at the time she was trying to get a good grade, but she ended up accomplishing that goal.
Getting caught up in the moment makes it hard to see the joy and creativity that is all around. We live in a big beautiful world that God created for us, and we are too busy to notice it. To add to that God made us to have gifts and we should use those gifts to bring glory to God. Why have a talented artist put her paintings in the basement? Why have an author not share her stories? Why would someone that is good with numbers and math not help a business run better? Fear can play a role but we were also taught that there is no fear in love. God loves us, he gave us the talents and gifts we have so that we can share them with the world. When we allow fear to overtake us we don’t take the next steps, we hide our first, second and third editions, we make excuses as to why we can’t do something now. Believing in the gifts God has given you isn’t easy, but is there really anything in this world that is? Until next time:
Sometimes, before a thing can go right, it has to go wrong. Maybe many times. If it’s important to you, keep doing it. And don’t be so hard on yourself! You’re doing better than you think
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
Goal, set, gratitude! A few months ago I was talking with my oldest daughter. I told her I was thinking about writing a children’s book based on a blog post I had written (What’s Your Worth). In my mind it was going to be something that would help kids know that they have a special shine all their own, they just have to bring it out by believing in themselves. The goal was set, I had given myself until the end of the year to get it written, published and in a bookstore in town. This really was a lofty goal since I am a full time vet tech and momma of three. My free time is dictated by the amount of time I want to give to my sanity. The goal was set and my daughter was told, so there was no room for failure. In August of this year I finished my book and got it out to a company that would print it and get it on order lists for places like Barnes and Noble and Amazon to sell it. I had done it! Mostly….I wanted to get it into the local area since I knew the chances of people actually seeing it on big websites was slim.
Enter in a friend of mine that owns the local bookstore. This bookstore is the cutest place, she has hidden corners in which you can hide away to read, she has used and new books, she even has a little coffee shop so that you can stay caffeinated while enjoying the company of a good book. It was the perfect place to see if I could make something of my book. All I needed to do was work up the courage to ask her. She made this so much easier one day when she texted me saying “she did this thing”. Of course I was curious so I texted back “do tell…..”. She said she went out and got a puppy, and so after I congratulated her and set her up with the initial vet appointments, I told her that I “did a thing”. I let her know that I had written a kids book and asked if she would be willing to look it over and have it be in her store. That was so nerve wracking, it felt like I was sending my own flesh and blood child out into the world and hoping for the best. Without hesitation though she said absolutely. She even went further and said a “story time” should be set up so that I could read my book to kids in her store. I was so excited, but terrified. What if no one liked my book? What if no kids showed up to the story time?
Courage helps you do the things that seem impossible to do. I am not a natural writer, but I write a blog and I published a book. I doubt myself all of the time, and there are many days in which other people look better, seem to have their acts together, and seem to have more talent in their pinky finger than I do. If I let myself dwell on those thoughts than I would never try anything new. The story time was scheduled, I made sure the bookstore had my books to sell, I even had a very talented friend of mine make a doll based on the main character “Rae”. When I showed up on the day I was to read my book, I was nervous, but I also knew that I could do it. I was and still am so very grateful to my friend for giving me the opportunity to share my book. I had three kids show up. I read my book to those three kids. Each one got to have a copy of my book and a doll to go with it. A few days after, I received an email from a bookstore in the next town over that agreed to have my book on consignment at their store. These are small victories. Each day I need to remember the lesson that “Rae” had to learn and re-learn it myself. When we focus too much on what other people can do we miss out on the talents that we have ourselves. Do I want to write another book, yes? Do I want my current book “Rae’s New Shine” to get into more kid’s hands, yes! What I won’t do is set my worth on the success of what I do. In the end I am grateful for the challenges I take on and the lessons I learn. Fear, and anxieties won’t hold me back, and hopefully they don’t hold others back. Until next time:
Rae’s New Shine Children’s Book
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
$12.00
“my child, you don’t know your worth and that is why you are not shining as bright as you could be”-Rae’s mom (excerpt from Rae’s New Shine, by Heather Bartlett)
This weekend I had the joy of going to a retreat that was set in the woods. I was surrounded by the beauty of God’s creation. I also got the opportunity to sleep in a cabin with bunk beds that were meant for a child with bones made of rubber. I try and joke but seriously, think boards with cushions about as soft as a board. To be fair I didn’t go to the retreat to sleep, but to have fellowship with the ladies of the church I attend. I was not disappointed.
It’s amazing what can happen when you get a group of ladies together. The different personalities shine through. As I sat down to write this we had just gotten done with worship and a time of teaching. The gal that spoke to us had such an amazing story to tell. She spoke with conviction but humbleness, knowing that she was not perfect but that with her story she could help someone make it through theirs. “Free time” was scheduled for afterwards. Some of the ladies started craft projects but most found other ladies and started playing games. Let me tell you, you haven’t been to a woman’s retreat (at least at this church) without hearing laughter and yelling due to a game. It is hilarious. Women that are normally quiet turn loud and competitive with bunko. Momma’s that have young kids are out having actual conversations with other ladies. Workaholics can relax and try something new. Teenage daughters spend time with their mommas. Excessive food is eaten, and hikes are taken.
The main topic this weekend was to be anchored in what you believe in. We as women love to be in control. If there isn’t something to control, we will make up something to control. We run our households, we have jobs, we have kids and husbands, and for most of us we push ourselves without the thought of rest. When a shelf is hung without the nail being secured in a stud, it can’t hold much weight and can fall. When a ship doesn’t drop it’s anchor at the right time, it is not secure. When we go about this world on our own we will fail. When women get together to learn and grow in Christ, they also get together to learn and grow with each other. This retreat taught me that that I could have reached out sooner to a gal who is going through some of the same struggles I am going through. I learned that hard work, prayer and time can make miracles happen. I learned that we as humans must own up to our responsibilities, and then learn and grow from them. I also learned that if you tell an older “more mature” lady that they shouldn’t move tables without help, it only makes them want to do it more.
We often hear that the female gender can be mean and nasty to other females, and there are times when I have seen that happen. What I have seen more than that though, is support and love. When push comes to shove, we support each other. New mommas get advice from more seasoned mommas. Grandma’s help raise grandkids. Aunts become way cooler than moms, especially when the yellow Volkswagen bug comes out. When someone gets hurt, support and care come out of the woodworks. My daughter and I got to spend time together. When I got bad news this morning, I thought I could hide the pain I felt, but even with that, a gal I had gotten to know pulled me aside and asked if I was ok. Women are amazing creatures, when they become “sisters” with other women, they become powerful creatures. A force to be reckoned with, and one to be relied on. Until next time:
You’ve survived too many storms to be bothered by raindrops
I love to hear people’s stories. Through their experiences, trials and joys they became the people they are. When I was younger I would ask my grandma to tell me stories, in which I would learn about her life as a child and then what it was like to be married with five kids. I loved to visit with her and looking back I wish I would have had the forethought to write down the experiences she went through. Her narrative was mostly about simpler times, but she never made them sound like they were hard times. Throughout her life I knew she didn’t always have it easy but that never stopped her from loving us grandkids, supporting us and making sure when people came to visit they were well fed. She was a rock in our family.
As an adult, married with kids, I wonder what is seen as my narrative. Do I make the way my life is seem harder than what it is so that people will want to listen to me? Do I brush things off too easily even if I may be struggling with something that someone is willing to help me with? Do I hold back on my excitement of things because I don’t want to make a spectacle out of myself? I want my narrative to be strong and full of love and joy, not that there won’t be hard times but I want strength and perseverance to shine through. A gal I was talking to once was telling me of all the things she wanted to do but she was going to wait to do them until her kids were older. At first I thought “how sad, why wait?” but then it dawned on me that this is what her narrative is. Her current story has her kids as the center point. She finds joy in that, she is strong in that, when that shifts and she becomes more of the center then she can do the things her heart desires. Another person I talked to had some major trauma in her younger years that made her grow up way too soon. She had a lot to work through, but what she gained from the events that happened is that they would not define her. She made mistakes, she let people down but she also lifted people up and encouraged people to move forward, to take back their lives and be who they want to be.
This week I am doing something that is a little bit scary for me to do. It may not seem like much, but I am reading a book to a group of kids. This isn’t just any book, it’s a book I wrote about above all things believing in yourself. I may show up and have one kid there, or I may show up and have twenty. You may be thinking: “how hard could this be?” and I would be thinking the same thing if it were someone else, but it’s me. I am putting my heart out on the line, hoping that the kids will like the story. What I am also doing is showing my own kids that they need to take risks, try something new and have fun along the way. I am also growing and learning that taking risks and having goals is living. I have days in which I get home from work and think my co-workers must think I am the meanest person ever, my kids don’t want to listen to what I have to say and my hubby swears I moved things to test his patience. It’s on these days in which I have to chose to change the narrative. I have to find the joy, find the good, and realize that when I think these negative thoughts majority of the time they are not true (except of course when I try and test my hubby’s sanity). What’s your narrative? Is it laced with positivity or negativity? Do you live your life in a way that people want to sit and hear your stories? Until next time:
You don’t need to rearrange the stars or move mountains to be enough. You don’t need to have your entire life in order, or be perfect in any way. You just need to be able to offer love, and be willing to receive it in return, because that’s all anyone ever needed anyway.
This week I bought a notebook. This notebook is small but I am hoping that it will be mighty. Over the last couple of months the ability for me to notice the good and look past the bad had been weakened. Not that I don’t have a lot of good going on in my life, but I wasn’t keeping my thoughts in check and so the negative that was “in the area” was seeping into the processes of my brain. I was allowing myself to focus on what was aggravating me and causing me to be annoyed. Since I had been in a place like this before I knew I needed to do something and do it quick. So the purchase of this notebook was the first step in my little plan. Each day I would make sure this notebook was with me and whenever something good happened, I would write it down. It took a day to remember that I needed to do this assignment, I needed to see it as a mandatory verses a “if I have time” type activity. The following is some of the highlights of the list:
A dear friend of mine had been thinking about some of the things I had been struggling about. She came to me and asked me a very important question. She asked if I was praying for the person/people that had been causing me stress.
Another dear friend noticed that my fellow co-workers and I seemed to be always on the go and decided that she would feed us. She not only brought yummy chocolate cookies but brought meats, cheeses and crackers so that we had something nutritional as well.
Every night my hubby has a hot dinner ready by the time I get home
When I work late, I don’t have to worry about what is going on at home because my hubby has it all under control
I have teens that are girls, from what I am told most teenage girls are not into talking to their parents. Mine talk to me and let me know about their day. They are excited to share what they are doing.
My son hugs me every morning and says ” I love you” and still lets me pray with him and hug him before he goes to bed.
I get to help animals, and pet horses and goats when I visit people at their homes.
Have you ever smelled laundry that has been hung on the line to dry. Pure heaven, almost as good as the smell of homemade brownies.
Zucchini brownies, I don’t need to say anything more.
It is still summer outside, it is not cold, and the temperature is still above 70 degrees. This is perfect weather.
There was a fire recently that was close by, there were structures that burned, but no one lost their lives and as far as I know that goes for animals too.
Have you ever really looked into the “face” of a sunflower?
These are some of the items that needed to be written down. Some were significant while others were just observations. There is a story that has been passed around for some time now that talks about perspective. Here’s the story:
There is a story they tell of two dogs.
Both at separate times walk into the same room.
One comes out wagging his tail while the other comes out growling.
A women watching this goes into the room to see what could possibly make one dog so happy and the other so mad.
To her surprise she finds a room filled with mirrors.
The happy dog found a thousand happy dogs looking back at him while the angry dog saw only angry dogs growling back at him.
What you see in the world around you is a reflection on who you are.
Unknown
There is so much good in the world, but we overlook it because we get hyper-focused on the bad that is happening. We miss the field of sunflowers because there is mudpuddle in our path. We don’t take the adventure because there is too much work in getting to the path. We let our fears dictate how we live. We become like the angry dog in the story instead of finding the joy and the spectacular that has always been. Do you need a notebook? Do you need the simple assignment of looking for the good? Until next time:
I want to be like a sunflower. So even on the darkest days I will stand tall and find the light.
Every morning my dog Charlie gets let out of her kennel. She finds the nearest toy, grabs it and jumps on the bed to show us what she has. She has this fancy wiggle that includes a prance that practically folds her in half while she works to not step on the rope part of her toy. She is so happy to see whatever human crosses her path first. She doesn’t care that she probably has to pee. She doesn’t care that she needs to be careful to not step on her brother Jorj who is trying to sleep for just a little longer. She just knows that her day has started and she has a toy. Her energy is like this most of the day, especially when her humans are home.
My eldest and middle daughters love to get her riled up. Charlie has chosen my oldest as the one she must “protect” so the girls use this to their advantage when they play. They pretend to hit each other and here comes Charlie to the rescue. The problem is, is that Charlie is a 50 pound scaredy cat. On that note why are animals that are scared called scaredy cats. Most cats I know will stand their ground and have little daggers attached to their feet, but I digress. Charlie can be in a deep sleep, and be there to “protect” in 2.5 seconds, but have me walk through the door with scrubs on and she runs to hide in the farthest room in the house. In her own special way Charlie has perfected the act of living. To be honest I think I should take lessons from her.
Every day we get to wake up and climb out of bed. We get to eat our breakfast and for most of us head to work, and for others they stay home to work or be with the kids. There are certain things we need to do to make sure our basic needs are met, but apart from these things we can chose what to do with our free time. A couple of days ago I was admiring the deck that a client had. She had this huge deck that had pots and pots of flowers that were lined up around the perimeter. If you were able to take your eyes off the flowers you would see that the view she had off the deck was just as beautiful. When I mentioned that she probably has a hard time leaving her house with all this beauty around her, she gave me this look, that made me think it was easier than what I thought it would be. She agreed it was beautiful but there was a lot of work that was put into at least the beauty that I was seeing near the house.
The act of living requires work. We have to put work into what we do daily. If we were able to be like my dog Charlie life would be simple but it wouldn’t necessarily be easy. For a dog who is a pet, they depend on their people for their basic needs, but they have to trust that when we leave them every day that we will come back. We protect them as much as they would protect us. These are not easy things to ask of our pets that don’t even understand most of the words we say to them. The act of living requires us to make decisions sometimes that are hard. The client I visited could have chosen fake flowers to put in the pots and would have had less work. Instead she put the time and effort in to create a space that she and her husband, friends and family can all enjoy. The act of living means turning off things so that we can turn on our imaginations.
On any given day I can find one if not all four of my family members on some sort of electronic device. There is Facebook, Tiktok, Instagram and more that will waste away so much of their lives it’s really quite sad to think about. I am not immune to this problem either. There are nights in which I have watched so many little videos I am sure I can make a cake while riding a horse through Disneyland. The internet has taken over the world, and information can be obtained about almost anything and everything if you just look. When the decision is made to turn off the devices though, my eldest daughter will draw beautiful pictures. My middle child will paint and find recipes to try out. My youngest will play. He will get board games out, and more often than not get the dogs outside. My hubby will tinker with his motorcycle, take it out for rides and has been known to build decks, playhouses and furniture with his own plans. When I get off my device, I color with crayons, write books, get random thoughts put into my blog and try my hand at gardening. There is joy in the act of living. Even if it’s simple, even if it’s not always easy. The joy is found when the act is acted upon. Until next time:
Your diet is not only what you eat. It is what you watch, what you listen to, what your read, the people you hang around……be mindful of the things you put into your body emotionally, spiritually, and physically.
One day Rae woke up and felt different. When she looked at the people around her they seemed to “shine brighter” than she did. When she finally prayed about it and asked her mom for help, she realized she didn’t know her own worth. She didn’t believe in herself and felt dim compared to others. Once she started to see she was talented and worthy her shine came back.
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A Quote To Love
She was beautiful
But not like those girls in the magazines
She was beautiful for the way she thought. She was beautiful for that sparkle in her eyes when she talked about something she loved.
She was beautiful for her ability to make other people smile, even when she was sad.
No, she wasn’t beautiful for something as temporary as her looks. She was beautiful deep down to her soul.
Living Joyfully 